Monday, February 6, 2012

A Statement From Nutty Nancy

My fellow Catholics,

This week, the Catholic Church learned that they are required to pay for their employees healthcare plans, which includes contraception benefits. As a practicing Catholic, I am quite pleased that my Catholic Church, as backward as it is, will finally be dragged into the modern age. I continue to stand side-by-side of my new, improved Catholic Church.

Finally, there is a new morality sweeping the old, tired morality away! As a grandmother, my heart leaps for joy in knowing that our wonderful President, along with our Congress, CAN overturn the last 2,000 years of Western civilization.

I promise to keep protecting the rights of women, by protecting a woman's god-given right to have her unviable tissue mass torn limb-from-limb, and sucked out of her thru a vacuum tube, if that's what she wants.

Someday soon, I may even begin reading what was in The Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, because I am deeply interested in knowing just what it was that I had voted for back in 2010.

Thank you.

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