Thursday, December 29, 2011

The RedSquirrel Report Looks Forward To 2012

As 2011 draws to a end, we look forward to the new year. Your bushy-tailed reporter is really going out on the limb with some bold predictions for the year 2012. For instance:

We predict that if Barack Obama wins re-election, he will declare himself President-For-Life, then declare that he will go on a golf vacation.

After nine more months of character assassination, smears, and patented Axelrod dirty tricks against ALL of the GOP Presidential candidates, a new Republican candidate appears from out of nowhere......Alan Keyes.

Disgraced New York Representative Anthony Wiener will debut a reality TV show on MTV.

Expect even more anti-Semetic nuttery in 2012............................

North Korea and Iran will be even more unstable and dangerous, and the threat of that electromagnetic pulse bomb will make 2012 even scarier. But on the bright side, Kim Kardashian will marry another sports star.  My money is on wide receiver Chad Ochocinco.

Former Penn State Assistant Coach Jerry Sandusky will very, very happily accept a position as Obama's new 'Afterschool Physical-Education Czar'.

On December 21, 2012, the current calender will end. President Obama will present a new calender, and re-name the months Obamary, Obamruary, Obarch, Obril, Obay, Obune, Obuly, Obgust, Obember, Obctober, Obvember, and Obcember. Then, a big meteor will hit Earth.

Happy New Year, everybody!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

I Am J. RedSquirrel, Uniquely Qualified

(insert 'Morning In America"-styled music here)

Hi. I am RedSquirrel, and I am uniquely qualified to be The MOB's next Mayor....

RedSquirrel led the fight against Obama's ATTACK WATCH. COM, mocking the regime's ridiculous website. has blown the lid off several scandals in 2011....

RedSquirrel is a 3-time caller into The Northern Alliance Radio Show, and still hasn't been banned from the program. He's made hosts Mitch Berg and Ed Morrissey LAUGH:

(Mitch Berg: "Up next is Joe from South Minneapolis. You're on the Northern Alliance Radio Network. What say you?"
Joe a.k.a. RedSquirrel: "Does the name JACK RYAN ring a bell?"
Mitch and Ed laugh....)

It was RedSquirrel who exposed Minnesota Governor Mark 'Crazy Eyes'  Dayton's attempt to hold the state hostage during the state shutdown in 2011. Here is the intercepted letter the Governor sent to the State Republican leadership:

RedSquirrel. Uniquely qualified.

As Obama Goes On Vacation, The Nation Breathes A Sigh Of Relief

This week, the Messiah's new job approval numbers indicate that 47% of the American people approve of the job he's doing.

But President Obama has been on vacation in Hawaii.

If he works, he wrecks the country and it's economy. If he goes on vacation, the nation breathes a sigh of relief. The new numbers indicate that the best thing he can do for this country is stay on vacation.

In November 2012, we have an opportunity to send The Messiah on a permanent vacation.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Open Letter To Speaker John Boehner

Dear Mr. Speaker,

My name is J. Redsquirrel. Merry Christmas to you and your family.

I am writing to you in regards to an issue important to many bloggers across this country. In September, I turned myself into President Obama's ridiculous snitch site, also known as Attack Watch. I gave them my blog's URL and my e-mail address.

Subsequently, I have gotten many, many e-mails from the Obama For America 2012 campaign. Most of these annoying e-mails are requests for campaign donations. Yesterday, I received one from Reggie Love.

I have used these e-mails as fodder for my blog, ridiculing and mocking the Obama Regime and campaign, but I am growing weary of this, and would like this insanity stopped.

 Congress passed legislation regarding unwanted phone solitication, otherwise known as 'the no-call list'.

I propose a law that would make it illegal for President Obama (or any of his campaign staff) to harass conservative bloggers like myself, with nonstop campaign contribution requests  (via e-mail), or at the very least, make them send these requests where it probably belongs, in the spam box.. I want this pestilence to end.

I propose that we name it  The No-Obama-Email-For-Campaign-Contribution List, HR. 57.

Again, Thank you.
J. RedSquirrel

The Keystone XL Oil Pipeline: Is This A Good Thing?

Your bushy-tailed correspondent has been reading up on this project. From what a have learned, this pipeline will start in Alberta and end in Texas, and will relieve some of our dependence on Middle East oil.

It has been rumoured that some of these countries in the Middle East may be hostile to America. There also appears to be some conflict in this region. From what I understand, America and Canada share a border, and have not yet gone to war against each other, except in the movies. ('Canadian Bacon').

This project will create thousands of construction jobs, as well as many more jobs associated with the operation of this pipeline. But, on the other hand, these would be private-sector jobs, and our President apparently disapproves of the private sector.

Also, this project will create tens of thousands of new tax-paying Americans, and that's not good for the Democrats. They depend on the dependent to stay in power.

Also, it is very important that President Obama drags his feet on this project in order to receive badly-needed campaign cash from both the environmental lobby and 'big oil'. The Messiah is running for re-election, and needs money from both groups.

This is a very complex issue. America needs to create jobs, but should it come at the expense of our good friends in Iran and Pakistan?

I need to read more....

The 2011 Golden Loony Award Goes To....

Let's keep the year-end honors rolling, with The RedSquirrel Report's 2011 Loon Of The Year Award.

With the end of the NARN's First Team John Hinderacker and Brian 'St. Paul' Ward's radio show in January 2011, and with it, their Loon Of The Week Award, I decided to carry on this fine tradition.

Throughout 2011, our resident lefty lib Longfellow Loon bestowed the 'Loon Of The Week Award' to a deserving lefty, for his or her wacky, leftist quotes.

So here he is, to hand out The Golden Loon Of The Year Award, is our very own....Longfellow Loon.(applause)

Thanks, Squirley. The 2011 Loony Award nominees are:

Vice President Joe Biden, who said that we need to raise taxes, or murder and rape will skyrocket in Flint, Michigan.

Former Advisor to Jimmy Carter Zbignew Brzezinski, who suggested that there should be a public list of rich capitalists who resists heavier taxation.

But the winner is....LOOOLOOOLOOLOOOLOOOLOO!!!! The Occupy Wall Street Protesters!!!!! They are a double-winner this year, having also won Time Magazine's Person of the Year Award....LOOOLOOLOOLOOOLOOOLOOOLOOOLOOOLOOOLOOOLOOLOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Accepting the award is none other than Creepy Mask Guy.

"Thank you, thanks......thanks......I would like to thank the Editorial Board of The RedSquirrel Report for this golden Loony, but I cannot accept this alone. I share this with all of the others who carried the signs trashing the filthy Jewish bankers. A special shout-out to my associate Gavin, who brought much-needed publicity to our cause by crapping on that cop car. Thanks, man.

A special thanks to S.E.I.U. for setting up those tents. It gave some of our rapists some privacy.

Finally, a special shout out to the big guy, George Soros. Thank you."

Thanks for watching, If America is still here in December 2012, we'll do this again. See ya'.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

A Nation Mourns For Kim Jong Il (1942-2011)

Last week, potbellied dictator Kim Jong Il died. The long-time ruler of The People's Republic of North Korea assumed room temperature on a train.

The news anchor at our North Korean bureau told us the sad news on Monday. She was accompanied by a government representative:

"Our god-like leader has been taken from us (cry! cry more! or we'll shoot you!),  from working so hard. So, he will be greatly missed. (loudly blow your nose) From the hundreds of thousands of tortured political prisoners to the millions that are being the evil, rich capitalists outside our hermetically sealed society....

Our wondrous leader (now start blubbering uncontrollably), was a fantastic golfer, with supernatural abilities. He shot a round of 39, with 11 holes in one....We must remember the good times, and the imported lobster and cognac he and his bureaucrats enjoyed while millions of North Koreans starved....

He loved movies so much that he would have movie directors kidnapped, and brought to our communist paradise.

He was also quite a little rascal, building up our nuclear weapon program right under the nose of doddering old Uncle Sam! (now, laugh and cry simultaneously).

And so, in his memory, the  enslaved people of North Korea must labor even HARDER! (now, break down, crying and thrashing about. good. We will let you live for another day, lady news anchor).

end transcript.

Obama's Modesty Pose

In a recent '60 Minutes' interview with Steve Croft, our Messiah suggested that he was one of the greatest American Presidents ever, and that his accomplishments are rivalled only by Presidents' Lyndon Baines Johnson, Abraham Lincoln, and Franklyn Delano Roosevelt.

 It's too bad that '60 Minutes' edited out that claim. I wish that everyone could have had the opportunity to hear The Messiah's proclamation.

One can barely imagine how hard it must've been for The President to lower himself in such a way, to actually compare himself with three mere mortals. After all, this god-like being has boasted that he could lower the sea levels. This intellectual giant is worshipped in government schools across the country ('Barack Hussein Obama, mmm mmm mmm").

I wonder if this malignant narcissist has ever shot a 39, just as wacky, newly dead North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il has often boasted?

With all the time he spends at the golf course, I wouldn't be surprised if he believes he has.

In Other Words, I'm The Outsider

Over at The Kool Aid Report Blog,  LearnedFoot, Minnesota Organization of Bloggers' Secretary of State-for-life,  has officially set the field of 6 nominees for the crucial position of Mayor of The MOB.

Yours truly has made it to the final 6. In KAR's 'meet the candidates' post, Secretary Foot has indicated that I am the outsider/dark horse of this race. Actually, he said this:

Nominee #6 red squirrel: "I have absolutely no idea who this guy is".

I've sized up the competition, and it looks like my only shot at this is to build a well-armed military junta, and overthrow this process. I'll have more later.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Turn On The Red Siren, Mr. Drudge, I Have An Announcement

My name is J. RedSquirrel, and today, I officially announce my train wreck....I mean....nomination for the all-important office of Mayor of the MOB (Minnesota Organization of Bloggers). Today (insert god-like reverb), I jump into the snark-infested waters of bloggitorial politics.

These are critical times for The MOB, and for the world we live in.

We need a leader who will bring greatness to this great organization. Unfortunately, I am not that leader. I am more interested in using this election as a tool for shameless self-promotion. But then, everybody already knows that. In fact, I am absolutely positive that I have no leadership qualities whatsoever.

Just my mere presence in this race should be an affront to all of the REAL bloggers out there.

I am J. RedSquirrel, and I approve of this message. If you wish to make a tax-deductible contribution to my campaign, just put some cash in an envelope, and hand it to me. Thank you.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Happy Holikwanzahannamas From The Obamas

It's President-For-Life, Barack Hussein Obama,

Tonight I speak to you from the White House, as me and First Lady Michelle are decorating the holiday tree with shiny lights and little straw men, and speaking of straw men, I would like to take this time to discuss those mean grinches who won't pass my tax increase on anybody making over $1,000,000.

My economic advisor, Tiny Tim Geithner and John 'Uncle Billy' Corzine are testifying before Senate Minority Leader Mitch 'Mean Old Man Potter' McConnell, while the sugarplum fair.......I mean, Massachusetts Representative Barney Frank dances out his last term in office.

(Correction: Tim Geithner is still Secretary of the Treasury. I thought that when America found out that he was a tax cheat, that he did the right thing and resigned. I was wrrrrooo......I was wroaaaa.....dammit, I was wrong.)

This is the season where we all wish for peace on Earth and goodwill to men, that is, as long as they don't work in the private sector. Look out, Gibson Guitars and Boeing!

If I didn't bankrupt the coal industry, then there would be some left over to put in the stockings of  those troublemakers Rush Limbaugh, Shawn Hannity, and Glenn Beck.

It is always better to give than to receive. Just ask the Iranian Mullahs. I gave them that predator drone, and I really hope that they don't try to return it.

Let's pray for the souls of those mean old fat-cat corporate executives, as they ride around in their corporate jets this holiday season. Meanwhile, the Republicans on Capitol Hill want children to fend for themselves. Where's their humanity?

A special greeting goes to the Occupy Wall Street protesters. I only hope that the police don't turn on any fire hoses on them. In this weather, they may be turned into human pop sickles.

Here in the White House, the seasonal activity is fast and furious.....uh....take that off the teleprompter....I mean, our elves in purple shirts are working hard. We are shipping 40,000,000 unsold Solyndra solar panels  to the poor and needy.

In other words, we're buying their votes.

This is President-For-Life, President Barack Hussein Obama, wishing the bottom 52% wageearnerswho paynoFederalIncomeTax, a Happy Hollikwanzahannamas. Thank you.

Minimally Qualified To Be Mayor Of The MOB

(Insert patriotic music here):

My name is J. RedSquirrel, and I am forming an exploratory committee.

In the coming days, I may nominate myself for the important office of Mayor of The Minnesota Organization of Bloggers. The MOB is faced with many challenges, and I believe that I am the best rodent for the job.

My positions on the issues:

I promise snark in every post and a comment in every........comment section.

I promise to hold the line on public decency. I will not allow male members of the MOB  to share shirtless profile pics on our facebook page. That's just gross.

I promise to not be a royal douchebag.

I promise to protect our community, by sounding the MOB Emergency Alarm System if The NARN's Mitch Berg and Ed Morrissey ever again try to sing any Tom Petty or Warren Zevon songs (or parodies) on the air (again). That was just scary.

In the coming days, I will share my qualifications for this office, such as:

My blog blew the lid off of the Minnesota State shutdown story of 2011. It was our expose' that proved that Governor Mark 'Crazy Eyes' Dayton did indeed take the entire state hostage. Below is the letter that Gov. Dayton sent to Senate Leader Amy Koch:

I am J. RedSquirrel, and I think that I approve of this message....

I Am RedSquirrel, And I Think That I Approve This Message

Over at The Kool Aid Report blog, MOB Secretary Of State For Life Learned Foot is holding an election for Mayor of The MOB (The Minnesota Organization of Blogs). Go to the Kool Aide Report for instructions and details, if you're interested in nominating your favorite (or least favorite) blogger.

Today (12/15/2011), your bushy-tailed correspondent announces that he is forming an exploratory committee, and may be seeking this important office.

In the coming days, I will be releasing my position papers. I believe that I am minimally qualified to be your Overlord.....I mean, Mayor.

Thank you.
J. RedSquirrel.

Disclaimer: If I am nominated, I am only in it for the page views.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Congratulations To Time Magazine's 2011 Douchebag(s) Of The Year

....and this year's award goes to.....the protester.(insert cowbell sound here).

Yes, those nice kids who toppled Middle Eastern dictators Hosni Mubarak and Moammar Qaddafi from power. With the assistance of 'Creepy Hungarian Dude' George Soros and Z-Big Brzezinski, those nice kids in Dungarees will probably install Sharia law throughout the Middle East soon. Yee-Haw!

And sharing the top honor, the OTHER collection of rapists, anti-Semites, losers, and cry-babies we call 'the Occupy Wall Street protesters'.

In the wonderful tradition of such moral luminaries as Adolph Hitler, Uncle Joe Stalin, and Benito Mussolini, Time Magazine has given this 'Man Of The Year' Award to that person or sometimes group of people who had the greatest impact on the world's stage that year.

But there again, ANYONE can win this distinction. Remember, a few years back, we all won. That was the year that Time Magazine made the greatest cop-out in publishing history when they gave the 2006 honors to 'You'. Sheesh....

I wonder what the acceptance speech would be like. An Egyptian takes to the mic, and yells something in Egyptian or Arab or Farsi, or whatever. Then we hear from the translator. It would go something like this:

"I would like to thank the moral relativist jack-a$$es at Time Magazine for this award. I would also like to thank reporter Lara Logan for the fun times last year. My, we had fun with her. Also, props goes to George Soros. The Arab Spring wouldn't have gotten off the ground without him."

One of his co-horts grabs the microphone, and yells: "DEATH TO THE WEST!"

Then, an OWS protester grabs the microphone....

"Yeah, thanks for this award. Never did I think that when I was defecating on that police car that I would be standing here today. At the OWS protests, I contacted at least three diseases that America HAD previously eradicated, but I GOT ON TV, and that's what really matters. I would also like to thank George Soros.

I can only hope that soon we can eradicate capitalism from the face of our planet. Thank you."

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Rapper Jay-Z Cashes In On OWS

That Jay-ZZZZZZ is simply amazing. He has the 'bling'. He has the wife (singer Beyonce). He rides in his gold-platted helicopter from concert to concert, and oversees his varied corporate interests.

Who has time to create actual music?

And for $35, you too can be the proud owner of his new line of  'I Attended The Occupy Wall Street Protests, An' All I Got Was This Overpriced T-Shirt'.

Our correspondent spoke to the rapper-entrepreneur about his new line of  t-shirts:

"Yo,  jus' because you ain't down wit' capitalism, don' means you can't buy my t's. Even if  you might've been raped or maced or sumptin' at the OWS protest, you can still remember the good times wit' this t-shirt.

I mean, SOMEBODIES gotta cash in, why not me? These t-shirts were made in Honduras. Dang, those kids do good work, don' they?"

Open Letter To Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa

Dear Mr. Mayor:

My name is J. RedSquirrel. I am a blogger based in the Twin Cities area.

As you already know, Mr. Zygi Wilf, the owner of the Minnesota Vikings, is threatening to move the 2-11 team to Los Angeles. Mr. Wilf  wants a brand-spanking new stadium, and is currently blackmailing the taxpayers of Minnesota, who are actually looking for a way to keep this horrendous team.

I'll bet that you watched the highlights of the mighty Vikings' 7-45 humiliation at the hands of The Evil Green Bay Packers, and thought to yourself, 'Wow, what would I give to bring that team of inept losers to MY CITY?'

A Viking player stands as good a chance of being indicted for domestic abuse as playing in the 2012 All-Pro Game in Honolulu. Our defensive backfield often play as if they have their helmets on backwards.

Our starting Quarterback, Donavon McNabb, played the quarterback postion like a drunk, regularly throwing the ball as if he was 'deliberately trying to miss our recievers'. Mercifully, he was benched, and then released by the team.

Not bad for a $7.25 million investment.

I am sure that you, and the two groups currently vying to bring The Los Angeles Vikings to Southern California, are salivating over this possible acquisition.

As for me, I am looking to you for help. How much money will it take to take this god-awful team off our hands?

If you want this team, please contact me at, and I'll help in any way I can.

Thank you,

J. RedSquirrel

Thursday, December 8, 2011

A Date That Will Live In Infamy

Yesterday marked the 70th anniversary of the Japanese attack of Pearl Harbor. On Tuesday, Our little dictator attacked America in a speech delivered in Osawatome, Kansas.

During the speech, the demagogue-in-chief kept yammered on the progressive tendencies of the trust-buster Republican President Theodore Roosevelt. Rush Limbaugh called the speech 'sickening', and Glenn Beck asked his radio cohorts to 'Please shoot me with an elephant tranquilizer'. Obama told the crowd of lemmings that the free-market system has never worked.

The speech was really THAT bad. We tried to run a transcript of the speech through our Truthteller 3000, but the speech broke our machine.

Your bushy-tailed reporter was thinking that since the current occupant of The White House liked lying so much, and using the words of a progressive Republican (even a Republican can be a progressive) President, I thought that it would be alright to return the favor by re-writing Franklin Delano Roosevelt's 'Date Of Infamy' speech:

"December.....the sixth.................two-thousand......and eleven..........a date that will forever live in infamy.....................when the marxist President...Barack....Hussein.....Obama.........did viciously and deliberately attack the free market system......of the United States Of America......

The ethically challenged....corrupt.....and dishonest President.....has wrecked the economy....over-whelming America with his destructive Cloward and Piven strategy, making America a nation of food stamp recipients .....killing our domestic energy industries......heaping bribes upon his cronies.....and  fanning the flames of hatred against the most productive members of our society....

We, the American people.....will defend ourselves against this onslaught.....The current occupant of the White House has declared war on the American people.....

On November....the sixth....two-thousand....and twelve.....the American people will deliver a crushing blow to this enemy of America.......Thank you........

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Cain Suspends Candidacy, While Obama Suspends Constitution

On Saturday, Presidential hopeful Herman Cain suspended his candidacy amid accusations of impropriety involving women other than his wife. Meanwhile, Barack Obama appears to be unscathed by multiple scandals involving illegal gun-running, an unprecedented level of corruption (Solyndra), and a total disregard for the rule of law. While Cain suspends his candidacy, Obama is suspending The Constitution.

While the Republican candidates tear into each other's imperfections, Obama wrecks the country.

While we yap about Mitt Romney and his flip-flops, Obama fans the flames of racial strife and gives his blessing to the anti-Semitic, violent 'Occupy Wall Street' demonstrations. At least he's consistent....

While the mainstream (and many in the 'conservative media) blather on Newt Gingrich's skeletons in his closet, most mavens in the 'news media' ignore Obama's radical friends, William Ayers, Bernadene Dorn, and the psychotic Reverend Jeremiah Wright.

While our candidates appear at debates moderated by leftists, Obama appears only before fainting, fawning audiences.

What the Republican Party needs is an attitude adjustment. Instead of the constant bickering,  we need to give the dirty Dems a taste of their own medicine.

Before most Americans ever heard of Saul Alinsky, there was a Republican strategist who kicked  the snot out of the Dems named Lee Atwater. In 1988, he made Democrat Presidential candidate Michael Dukakis into a national punchline.

We need to re-learn some things, people.

Any one of the GOP candidates is superior to the current occupant in the White House.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

RedSquirrel's Hollywood Minute

This week, your bushy-tailed correspondent will appear on 'Dateline NBC". Reporter/Host Keith Morrison is doing a segment on your bushy-tailed correspondent. I have written a new, unauthorized biography of former child actor Maureen McCormick, known to America as Marsha Brady.

In my new book "Oh My Nose!-The REAL Hollywood Story Of Marsha Marsha Marsha", author J. RedSquirrel tells the REAL story behind the famous 'Oh, My Nose!' episode, where Peter throws the football, and breaks Marsha Brady's nose. Here is a partial transcript from the upcoming 'Dateline NBC':

(KM): "The real truth is,  actress Maureen McCormick was deeply involved in drugs. In the 70's, many young actors snorted cocaine. McCormick had a particularly bad habit, one that culminated in the tearing of her nasal passage."

(MM):"Oh my nose!"

(KM): "....and to cover this terrible secret, Sherwood Schwartz, creator and writer of "The Brady Bunch", wrote the infamous 'football episode', so that the cast and crew could work around young Maureen McCormick's condition.
(MM): "Oh my nose!"

(KM): "We spoke to the author of this block-buster book. He disclosed that Schwartz had a contract with the cast, and that even the destroyed nose could not stop the shooting schedule".

(J.Redsquirrel): "Sherwood Schwartz was an evil taskmaster. Instead of getting the young actress the help she needed, he wrote the episode in question to fulfill contractral obligations with the network. They wanted 22 episodes, and by hell or high water, he was going to write  (and shoot) 22 episodes."

(MM): "Oh My Nose!!"

 End of transcript.

This just in. I have just received word that NBC has scrapped the segment.

Dear (Current) Occupant (Of The White House)

Dear (Current) Occupant ( the White House),

Last week, America learned of your re-election strategy includes the writing off of the white working class. Wow.  How is even possible that a U.S. President can even get away with admitting this in public?

Instead, your re-election campaign will concentrate on support from college academics, artistes, actors, unionistas, and of course, the black and Hispanic 'underclass'.  By publicly disclosing that your 2012 campaign will not even seek the white, working class vote, you are really bragging that you have destroyed the white working class, and are trying to marginalize this voting block. It also proves that you are racist, as well as a liar.

In 2008, you ran as a post-racial candidate. As President, you have divided the American people by race and class. You have fanned the flames of intolerance, and have given your support to the violence and anti-Semitism of the 'occupy Wall Street movement'.

We the people reserve the right to impeach you, and remove you from your current residence for your role in Operation Fast and Furious, as well as your administration's unprecendented level of corruption and criminal activity.

On November 6, 2012, your landlords (the voters) are going to evict you. Be out of the White House by January 20, 2013.

J. Redsquirrel.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

The Rick Santorum Strategy?

There was a Major League baseball season , sometime in the 1980's (was it 1987, or was it 1984?), when each team in the American League West held first place for at least day, before one of the teams finished the season on top, and won the AL West.

This Republican Presidential campaign reminds me of that season. It started out with that Mormon with the great hair on top, then Minnesota Michele won the Iowa Straw Pole, and challenged him for the top spot in the polls. Then, Texas Rick entered the race, and stole Michele's thunder.

Then, Texas Rick started putting his foot in his mouth, and The Pizza Guy made his move. Then, his campaign was rocked by charges of impropriety with women (not his wife), and The Pizza Guy fell back in the pack.

Now, we have the Former Speaker Newt making a charge. The news media, as well as members of the conservative media, are already attacking him. As soon as you lead in the polls, you're attacked by your opponents as well as the mainstream news media.

There are three candidates who have yet to lead in the polls. John Huntsman, Ron Paul, and Rick Santorum. As long as bad news keep knocking the top tier candidates off the top of the hill, maybe the second tier isn't that bad a place to be.

If Santorum can get the Republican base to take him as a serious contender, maybe he can make that surprising, late-season surge that can take him to the GOP convention in August 2012, then maybe he can win the pennant, and go on to win the World Series...

 I mean, the 2012 Presidential Election.

(Disclaimer: The RedSquirrel Report is a blog that parodies the news and news makers of the day. Your bushy-tailed reporter isn't a professional pundit. If you're a gambler, and decide to bet on former Senator Rick Santorum to win the election next year, please bet responsibly.  Thank you.)