Thursday, March 29, 2012

Why Is Pat Robertson Talking About Football?

Hi, folks. Today on the 700 Club, I am going to talk about football. As you know, those heathens, the Denver Broncos, have sent God's Favorite QB Tim Tebow to the New York Jets. Now, because the Broncos have exiled this fine Christian, I am predicting pestilence, frogs, and locusts to rain down on them, and they may finish 0-16 next season.

God bless the New York Jets! May the blessings of God shine on this fine franchise! I only hope that their current QB Rick Sanchez doesn't get angry if he loses the starting job. Remember when Cain lost his cool, and BRAINED his brother Abel with a rock?

I pray that Head Coach Rex Ryan will put together the best offensive line to protect Tebow, and his terrible arm.

Alas, the Denver Broncos went and got Peyton Manning, who left the Indianapolis Colts. He has a bad neck, but hasn't called our prayer line yet. I am not sure if God will completely heal his neck, since he has joined that team of HEATHENS.

One team that will incur the full wrath of GOD is the New Orleans Saints. They play dirty, and I am PRAYING for a hurricane that will break the levees, and flood The Superdome! In the name of the father, the son, and the holy hosts at the CBS, NBC, and FOX Pregame shows....

God bless Jeremy Shockey, for we believe that he is the Saint who spilled the beans on that bounty business. If he confesses the sins of that team, he should be forgiven.

But there again, nobody likes a snitch.

I have a prophesy that the New York Jets will win the Superbowl, 63-40. Go Tebow!


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