Monday, May 7, 2012
Who's The Genius (Behind The Life Of Julia)?
Obama: "Think, people, think! We tried the War On Women crap, but that backfired. We tried race-bating on Zimmerman, but THAT blew up all over us. And don't even get me started on Romney's dog Seamus!
Jim Messina: We didn't know that Zimmerman was a Peruvian-black man, Mr. President.
Obama: I need something that reminds the American people of MY GOD-LIKE greatness.
Jim Messina: We are working on a slide show we call "The Life Of Julia". As you can see, it depicts a faceless, incompetent NOBODY named Julia who is dependent on YOU throughout her entire life. In panel 'A', we see Julia at age 3....
Obama: ....So she wasn't aborted? You DO know that I'm a supporter of infanticide.
Jim Messina: No, Mr. President. Julia isn't aborted. At age 3, she attends Head Start, where she spends important time AWAY from her Republican parent(s). You also see that under President Mitt Romney, Head Start funding will be slashed. Us libs want to institutionalize the crumb-crunchers as soon as they can walk!
....Then in panel "B'', 17-year-old Julia is set to graduate from high school, because of your 'Race To The Top' law. We have successfully dumbed her down, and she has been indoctrinated by the government school. Meanwhile, under that maniac Romney, Julia's parent(s) got a tax cut for home-schooling her. Julia goes on to win The National Spelling Bee. She probably becomes a Mormon.
...On to panel "C'', 18-year-old Julia takes $100,000 in loans, and because of YOU, she gets a Pell Grant. Meanwhile, Richie-Rich Romney destroys her dream of being a professional student.
Let's skip to panel ''F'', After a steady diet of Womyns Studies courses and a worthless Major, Julia is primed to declare her undying allegiance to The Messiah after you make the stupid taxpayer pay for her college education. Romney on the other hand has condemned Julia to a life where she may have to (egad!) work her way through college! The monster!
In panel "G". Julia has a baby. There's no baby-daddy, no grand parents, no friends, no faith....but again, she has HER MESSIAH Barack Hussein Obama. With that weirdo Mormon as President, Julia becomes a doctor AT A CATHOLIC HOSPITAL!
Obama: Does Julia get married with Romney as President?
Obama Staffer: She marries....a man.
Obama: DAMN HER!
Jim Messina: In panels "I" and "J", our faceless ward of the state has food stamps, her trusty ebt card, Medicare, Medicaid, Obamacare, and her college loans are payed in full because of HER MESSIAH. She has an alter to YOU in her one-room apartment.
She has everything.........but a job. Or a husband.
Finally, in panel "K", Julia gets her Democrat Lifetime Service Medal from The Democrat Party U.S.S.A. ObamaCare keeps her alive until she passes away at the age of 167.
....and you are STILL PRESIDENT. So it is written, so shall it be done.
With that eeevil Romney as President (if Mitt's Great-grandson Bringham is the President in 2176), Mormons declare a Theocracy in America, and begins rounding up
Obama: Wow! Great work, Ginger! Let's do it!