As Director of Parks and Recreation, I am excited to tell you all about the variety of May Day activities The Board of Parks and Recreation has in store FOR YOU!
At 2:00 pm, come down to the park and watch our friends with The Occupy Movement, as they protest corporate America, and engage in some window-breaking.
Please, bring something to cover your mouth, for some of these protesters may be carrying tuberculosis. Also, if you are bringing your pre-teens, keep them at a safe distance. There may be a few rapists in the crowd, and we warn you that the signs these protesters carry may be offensive if you're not an anti-Semite, or would like to 'see the rich killed'.
At Floyd B. Olson Parkway, there will be a May Day Parade. Come on down and bring your wicker baskets, filled with whatever you wish. I suggest you gift wrap some soaps. The protesters will appreciate that.
Several local government unions wanted to burn Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker in effigy, but I personally refused their request. They may do it anyway.
Finally, join us at The May Pole, and dance to the music of Toxic Cannibal. What a SLAMMING way to wind down our May Day festivities.
So, come on down and have some May Day fun!
J. Red Squirrel
Director of Parks and Recreation
Mayor M. Dilettante
Office of The Mayor of the Minnesota Organization of Bloggers
Excellent report, Commissioner Squirrel!
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