Dear fans:
As you all probably know by now, I have decided to end my 72-day marriage to NBA superstar Chris Humphries. While divorces are often messy, I've decided that writing Chris off of my show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, was the best thing to do.
Yesterday, sister Chloe and I had an interesting discussion that involved the possibility of keeping the marriage together. We thought of opening up two phone lines:
1.800.111.1111 Don't divorce Chris Humphries
1.800.222.2222 Divorce Chris Humphries
I am already thinking about the future. The season finale of my show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, will feature our lawyers as they haggle over all the messy divorce stuff. Talk about must see t.v.!
I am also working on next season. Me and the family are narrowing down the field of potential new husbands. As usual, we will pick someone from the NBA or the NFL. We think that wide receiver Chad Ochocinco could bring some comedic relief to my show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
There is a rumour floating around that I was thinking of picking O.J. Simpson. As you know, he was my superstar lawyerdad's client. We decided to pass on him, because he's a little too old. And he decapitated his wife a few years back. Still, marrying O.J. would've been ratings gold.
I thank all my fans for watching my show, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, and for buying my Kim Kardashian merchandise. Keep watching.
Love.
Kim : )
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