Thursday, December 29, 2011

The RedSquirrel Report Looks Forward To 2012

As 2011 draws to a end, we look forward to the new year. Your bushy-tailed reporter is really going out on the limb with some bold predictions for the year 2012. For instance:

We predict that if Barack Obama wins re-election, he will declare himself President-For-Life, then declare that he will go on a golf vacation.

After nine more months of character assassination, smears, and patented Axelrod dirty tricks against ALL of the GOP Presidential candidates, a new Republican candidate appears from out of nowhere......Alan Keyes.

Disgraced New York Representative Anthony Wiener will debut a reality TV show on MTV.

Expect even more anti-Semetic nuttery in 2012............................

North Korea and Iran will be even more unstable and dangerous, and the threat of that electromagnetic pulse bomb will make 2012 even scarier. But on the bright side, Kim Kardashian will marry another sports star.  My money is on wide receiver Chad Ochocinco.

Former Penn State Assistant Coach Jerry Sandusky will very, very happily accept a position as Obama's new 'Afterschool Physical-Education Czar'.

On December 21, 2012, the current calender will end. President Obama will present a new calender, and re-name the months Obamary, Obamruary, Obarch, Obril, Obay, Obune, Obuly, Obgust, Obember, Obctober, Obvember, and Obcember. Then, a big meteor will hit Earth.

Happy New Year, everybody!

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