Thursday, February 13, 2014

Obama's National Prayer Breakfast Show

The following are some of the remarks President Obama made during The National Prayer Breakfast last week, fed through our TruthTeller 3000:

Thank you.

First of all, the only reason I am here today is because I was told that I was the one everyone would be praying TO. After all, I AM The Messiah, mmmm....mmmm.....mmmm.... 

America has a rich tradition of religious freedom....which I am trying to end. As you know, I am A CHRISTIAN....which is why I am persecuting Christians in the military and forcing Catholics to pay for other people's birth control.

My Christian upbringing is an important part of who I AM. My Communist parents, my Communist Grand-Parents, my Communist/terrorist friends Bill Ayers and Bernardine Dohrn, as well as all my Communist, Atheist college professors all taught me what I know. That IS WHY I 'stick it' to Christians every chance I get.

But that doesn't mean that I'm not a Christian.

My wedding ring has an inscription hailing Allah. As I've often said, the most beautiful sound is the Islam call to prayer. The second most beautiful sound is a crowd chanting, "Death to the great Satan!"

I gave f-16's and tanks to America's enemies, The Morsi Regime in Egypt. I've sided with the Muslims against Israel. This is how much I love The Christians and The Joos.

We should defend religious liberties, except for Catholics trying to get out of paying for other people's birth control. We should defend the defenseless, except for the unborn, as well the newly born. Women should never be punished with a baby.

We should always defend human dignity. God bless Planned Parenthood.

Allahu Akbar.

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