Monday, July 29, 2013

This Just In: MSNBC Damages Your Brain

Your bushy-tailed correspondent is always looking out for you. When there is a potential danger effecting millions of Americans, we are always there to bring this information to light.

While studying the effects of television viewing on the human brain, our resident scientist discovered something quite alarming.

Watching MSNBC for 1 minute kills 1,978,541 brain cells.

3,576,993 if you're watching that host with the tampons hanging from her ears.

Prolonged exposure to this cable channel may cause severe brain damage, and in many cases, madness. Second-hand viewing is also quite harmful.

If you watch MSNBC, please get your head checked.

The RedSquirrel cares.

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