Thursday, September 5, 2013

Obama: I Didn't Set The Red Line

A while ago, President Obama threatened Syrian Dictator Bashar al-Assad with retaliation if he crossed the red line by attacking Syrian rebels with chemical weapons.

Yesterday, our 9-year-old President denied that his Red Line Declaration was HIS. Here is his latest statement:

My fellow Americans,

I want to correct my critics who are unfairly using my words against me.

To be perfectly clear, this isn't MY red line. It's THE WORLD'S red line, but I DID NOT set the red line. If it was MY red line, Bashir al-Assad would never have dared to cross it. Nobody dares to cross a red line that I draw.

Also, this isn't MY credibility on the line. It's THE WORLD'S credibility on the line. When everything goes as it should, it's because of ME. I am ALWAYS perfectly credible.

Don't blame ME for this. Blame THE PREVIOUS ADMINISTRATION, THE GOP, or SOME OTHER PARTY OR GROUP OF FOLKS. You can't prove that I am at fault. I am only passing through. I've only been here for the last five years, so don't lay this on me.

You didn't see a red crayon in my hand. There is no photo or video of me with a red crayon in my hand, and if you can produce a photo or video of me with a red crayon in my hand, it must be a political cartoon or perhaps it's a photoshopped image.

I didn't do it. You didn't see it. You can't prove anything.

I never said ANYTHING about ME drawing a red line in the sand. I killed Osama bin Laden and kept GM alive, so I didn't HAVE TIME to draw OR set no red line.

Got it?

Barack Hussein Obama, President of the United States

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