Wednesday, December 12, 2012

They're Planning The Obama Inauguration Parade

It was announced that Jim "Gingers Have No Soul'' Messina will be in charge of Barack Obama's second inaugural parade. I can imagine it now:

Good morning, America. This is Bill Burditsman, and welcome to Our Glorious Leader's Second Inauguration parade. Later on, The One will take his oath of office in a private ceremony. He will be surrounded by friends, The Muslim Brotherhood, The Communist Party USSA, and cronies from Solyndra and Light-Squared.

We're not sure if he will take his oath on a Bible or a Quran. Oh wait, the parade is starting!

Our lead float features Sandra Fluke and Lena Dunham, as well as six weirdos in giant vagina costumes. There is a large sign that reads: "Our Lady Parts Thank You, Mr. President!" Impressive.

Next, we have The New Jersey Chapter of Obama Youth. They are marching down the street, and chanting:

"Barack Hussein Obama mmmm.....mmmm......mmmm......"

Up next, we have the SEIU Marching Band. Oh wait. they spotted a few protesters....and NOW THEY ARE BEATING THEM WITH THEIR INSTRUMENTS!

Our next float features our friends from south of the border, brandishing guns that our President sold them in his highly successful Operation Fast And Furious. Hey kids! It looks like they're throwing candy!

Next, we have some honored guests---Egypt's President Mohamed Morsi and Russia's Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev, riding on a float. There's a missile on the float, with a large sign that reads: "FLEXIBILITY". Yes! We all need to be flexible!

....and there is The President! He has stopped the parade for a moment. He gets out of the limousine, and.....he deeply bows to Morsi and Medvedev.

Next is First Lady Michelle Obama's Victory Garden float, There are 10 severely malnourished fifth graders sitting on the float, which is festooned with eggplant, freshly-picked cabbage, and carrots.

Now, the limousine takes it's final turn towards Pennsylvania Avenue, where thousands of supporters with signs and Obama phones greet the President....

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