The Dog Ate It

Today, President Obama finally showed us the birth certificate. Meanwhile, Dr. Jerome Corsi will go ahead with the release of  his latest book, "Where's The Birth Certificate?" Once again, Your intrepid RedSquirrel reporter delivers some startling revelations, detailed in Mr. Corsi's new tome. Among the startling new facts:

1. Hawaii was never officially made a U.S. state.
2. Barack Obama was never born, but was built in a laboratory. In Kenya.
3. The future president celebrated his conversion to Christianity by changing his name to Muhammad Kareem El-Obama, then to Barack Obama.
4. Where's the real birth certificate? The dog ate it.
5. The dog in question ran into World Trade Center Building One with a suicide vest on, on the morning of September 11, 2001, and blew itself up. The dog was trained by Dick Cheney.
6. The dead dog was made into a hairpiece.
7. Insert Donald Trump hair joke here.