My Top Ten Demands Of Black Lives Matter

Recently, Black Lives Matter made a list of ten demands on White people. Your bushy-tailed correspondent thinks it is a good idea to return the favor. Here are my top ten demands of my fellow Black Americans:

10. Stop asking me if I have a lighter. I didn't know that lighters were that expensive. Buy one.

 9. Stop 'auditioning'. (Black guys walk down the street and/or go on light rail trains, and start rapping or singing. Usually, they sound horrible. Many times I'm tempted to offer them $5 if they'll just shut up.)

 8. Get a belt or pants that fit. Normal people don't want to see your undies hanging out. You look stupid.

 7. Start treating females with respect. I always see Black males lurking around downtown and when they see an attractive female, they use vulgar, lewd language as their way of saying 'hello.' If that's your idea of a charm offensive, it's not charming.....It's just offensive.

 6. Stop asking strangers for money. You shouldn't leave the house without enough money for you to get through the day.

 5. Stop asking me for bus or light rail fare.

 4. Marry your baby mama.

 3. Stop picking fights with the police.

 2. Get yourself off the Democrat plantation. What the Hell have you got to lose?

 1. Get yourself a good education.