THIS JUST IN: USPS WORKER BUSTED AT CANADIAN BORDER WITH UNDELIVERED MAIL, INCLUDING BALLOTS

 

 

 

HEADLINE: 14,000 DEAD VOTERS IN MICHIGAN'S WAYNE COUNTY

 

And Now, An Update From Chairman Of The Biden For President Campaign Committee......

My fellow Americans,

As you know,  Soon to-be President-elect Joe Biden is just 6 electoral votes from winning the presidential election. We call on President Trump to end this national nightmare, and admit defeat.

We are still finding ballots in battleground states Michigan, Wisconsin, Georgia, Arizona, Pennsylvania, and North Carolina, and we violate their rights if we don't COUNT EVERY VOTE!!!! We are still harvesting ballots, and we're still receiving hundreds of thousands of mailed ballots. We cannot deny the rights of millions of Americans terrified by Covid 19.

President Trump has already caused the death of millions of Americans. It's not fair that he also disenfranchise the American people of their right to safely vote by mail.

Our people at the networks and cable news called Arizona way, way, too early, yet refused to call Georgia, North Carolina, and Texas! They are doing OUTSTANDING WORK!

Meanwhile, our poll workers in Arizona passed Sharpie markers to voters in heavily Republican counties. The ink bleeds through and spoils the ballot! We found over 100,000 votes in Michigan. All of these votes went to our guy, which proves how much America hates Trump!

Our muscle in Philadelphia locked out trouble-making Republican poll watchers, even after a judge ordered to let them in. THAT'S HOW MUCH OUR TEAM CARES FOR THE PEOPLE! WE'RE BREAKING THE LAW BECAUSE THE LAW STANDS IN THE WAY OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE!!!

Our friends at the networks and cable news are filling the airwaves with TOTAL GARBAGE, making the American People believe our 'Biden will win' narrative; 

We call on President Trump to concede, and call on his supporters to get behind the new president-elect, and stop spreading disinformation on Facebook and Twitter. We're confident that Joseph Biden will prevail. Thank you.

ABC NEWS / Washington Post Poll: Biden Leads Trump By 17 Points In Wisconsin

 Two days after Election Day. Still too close to call........

Hello, Newman

Here to address accusations of voter fraud and mail-in voting irregularities is a representative of The United States Postal Service:

My fellow Americans,

I just wanted to assure The American People that us postal workers are hard at work, delivering your mail-in ballots right where they belong. Absolutely none of your ballots are being tossed in dumpsters and no ballots are being kept in any storage spaces. I admit, there was THAT ONE TIME i kept mail in my storage space and my frenemy Jerry caught me. 

But that hardly really happens. HUH....huh..HEHEHEHEHEEEEE!!!!!!!

I'm watching some ongoing 2020 Election coverage right now. It looks like thee have been more votes cast in Wisconsin than there are registered voters. WHOOPS!!!!

Ah, LOOKY HERE! Michigan just found 100,000 votes, and they're ALL BIDEN VOTES!!!

It appears that the Republican poll watchers have been thrown out at polling stations in Philadelphia. President Trump has a big lead in Pennsylvania. i wonder how long it takes for Democrat campaign workers to fill out 600,000 ballots......

I assure you, there is no such thing as VOTER FRAUD. Hee,,,,HEHEHEHEHEHEEEEE!!!!!

Newman : )

It's The Cancel Culture, Charlie Brown

'It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown' will not be aired on network television this year, ending a long-standing, popular Halloween tradition. In an RSR exclusive we have been in touch with an insider at the ABC/ Disney Corporation, and our insider has told us that ABC will consider bringing ITGP,CB back as early as next year if it is re-written and approved by members of Black Lives Matter.

Expect the following changes:

Right-wing Skin head Charlie Brown has been beaten and forced out of his home. 'Peaceful protesters' spray paint the house.

During the Halloween party scene, the privileged White kids are terrorized by BLM. In a 'peaceful protest', the 'activists' chant and set fire to Snoopy's doghouse.

Lesbians Peppermint Patty and her friend Marcy plot against the nuclear family.

BLM confront Franklin, and browbeat him for having White friends.

BLM demands 15% of the trick-or-treaters candy, then ransack the stores. The gang learns a new word, 'Reparations.'

The Great Pumpkin is replaced by 'The Evil Orange President.' BLM protesters gang beat anyone with a red baseball cap.

Linus waits for the arrival of The Great Pumpkin, but is beaten by BLM. Then, they tear down the statues in town.

ABC hopes to begin production of 'It's The Evil Orange President' early in 2021.

 

 

How I'm Spending Election Night 2020

Well, this is the big day. Millions of Americans are doing their civic duty by voting. We might find out if incumbent President Donald Trump wins re-election, or Socialist Joe Biden is declared the winner of the 2020 presidential election tonight. Tension is high.

I voted on October 13. Many people on my facebook timeline have indicated that they have voted. One of my facebook friends is asking the people she knows How are you spending Election Night?

I have decided that I do NOT want to know who won (unless President Trump wins in an Election Night landslide), so I am building a Sensory Deprivator 5000 like the one that Ted Moseby built on the TV show How I Met Your Mother. 

If you remember the episode where the gang taped The Superbowl because they could not watch it live, and none of them wanted to know the final score. So, the gang agreed to stay away from all media, as well as anyone who might blurt out the final score.

Ted had to go to the bar for snacks, so he built a Sensory Deprivator 5000. He placed duct tape over a pair of sunglasses, punching two tiny holes of which he can just barely see where he is going. Then, he made blinders from an old cereal box. Finally, he bought noise-reducing headphones.

I've decided that I do not want to know who wins the presidential election (unless President Trump is declared the winner), and with my Sensory Deprivator, I hope that I will never hear the words 'President -elect Joe Biden'. I am preparing to keep this SD5000 on my head for the next four years, risking blindness as well as ear damage.

So, how are you spending Election Night?

Note: Please, somebody tell me if or when President Trump wins.