Our Art Critic Reviews The New Obama Portraits

Everyone on Twitter is either offended by or amused with these recent portraits of Barack and Michelle Obama, so The RedSquirrel Report has asked our art critic to write a piece. Take it away, Jerome:

Thank you, RedSquirrel. The portrait of our Black savior Barack Obama by anti-White artist Kehinde Wiley, has been unveiled, and the regular, uneducated, right-wing racist plebes are offended. The messiah is seated on a chair, with one arm resting over the other.

I stood and looked at the portrait on the right side, then walked over to the left side. I could have sworn The Messiah's eyes followed me. It almost seems like there's a soul trapped inside the painting.

He sits before a wall of kudzu weeds. To me, this wall of weed depicts Chicago's Wrigley Field, which would be the only place in Obama's gun-free paradise where a messiah can model for a portrait without being shot. Perhaps he wanted to sit before  marijuana plants, but decided not to.

Kudzu is an invasive herb, fundamentally transforming everything in it's path. To me, this plant represents the growing federal government under his 9-year-reign. Kudzu laughs at The Racist Constitution, and chokes-out Lady Liberty.

The Messiah has four fingers on one hand and six fingers on the other, and that reminds the viewer that he is not like the rest of us.

The 'artist', Kihinde Wiley, is known for paintings depicting strong Black women beheading White women. White racists bring this up because they couldn't stand the thought of a Black man in the White House.

'Michelle Obama', by Amy Sherald, is depicted with long, flowing hair and soft, feminine features. The painting looks more like Rozonda 'Chilli' Thomas from the 90's singing group, TLC than the former First Lady.

The female in the panting isn't scowling, and her shoulders aren't broad like Labron James. If the former First Lady wasn't there to unveil the painting, nobody would know who the female in the painting was.