HEADLINE: YESTERDAY MARKS ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF 'LET'S GO BRANDON'

 

SONG PARODY ALERT!! Timbuk 3 Sings The Feeding Our Future Scandal Theme Song

Here in Minnesota, we have this program for feeding hungry kids called ''Feeding Our Future', Instead of feeding hungry kids, there's been massive, rampant fraud associated with this non-profit. About 49 Democrats (including many Somalis) have been arrested, stealing around $250,000,000 from this program. 

In 1986, one-hit wonder Timbuk 3 released a top 40 hit 'The Future's So Bright I Gotta Wear Shades'. The song peaked at number 19 on the Billboard Hot 100. 

Here in 2022, we've paradied the song, and made this 1986 hit The Feeding Our Future Scandal Theme Song. Hit it:

Feeding Our Future

It's a big scandal

Now we're in big trouble

more than we can handle

They were supposed to feed the kids, They just stole the money

There was no oversight, They get a failing grade

Feeding Our Future is so rotten, corruption on full display

Corruption on display

We have 49 indictments for all of that corruption

Lots of Somalis down there in St. Pauli

This is getting bad, and it's only getting worser

The taxpayers were robbed and we were getting played

Ahmed was arrested at the airport, He was wearing shades

He was wearing shades

This is a scandal of incredible size

The taxpayers were fed a whole bunch of lies

The theft was great, and the scandal's getting bigger

Democrats in panic, It's blowing up in their face

Feeding Our Future corruption .....is on display

Corruption on display

It's looking like the October surprise

and the voters might just open up their eyes

The theft was great, and the scandal's getting bigger

The Governor in panic, It's blowing up in his face

More indictments are coming, Timmy looks dismayed

Timmy looks dismayed..........WOOOO!!

The RSR Completely Unbiased Voter Issue Questionaire

If you plan to vote in the upcoming midterm election, you will want to know how the two parties differ on important issues: 

If you are pro-life you will tend to vote Republican.

If you believe in murdering unborn babies, and support the murder/assassination of pro-life Supreme Court Justices, you may tend to vote Democrat.

If you believe that violent criminals belong in prison, you will tend to vote Republican.

If you approve of violent crime, especially against those you disagree with politicially, you may tend to vote for Democrats.

If you believe those who commit election fraud should go to prison, you may wish to vote for Republicans.

If you believe those who protested the stolen 2020 presidential election belong in prison without even a trial, you may tend to vote for the Democrat.

If you think that voter fraud is a problem, you will probably support Republicans.

If you see voter fraud as a strategy, you will tend to vote Democrats.

If you think that violent crime is a problem, you should vote for a Republicans.

If you want an increase of violent crime (or you yourself is a violent criminal), you shoud vote for a Democrat.

If you believe that the price of gas is too high, vote for the Republican.

If you think the price of gas isn't high enough, vote for the Democrat.

If you think All Lives Matter, vote for the Republican.

If you think (Only) Black Lives Matter, vote for the Democrat.

If you think that ingenuity, hard work, and pleasing you customer should be rewarded, vote for the Republican.

If you think money laundering, corruption, and robbing the taxpayer should be rewarded, vote for the Democrat.

If you think that plumbers and mechanics should keep more of their hard-earned money, vote Republican.

If you think that money belongs to Democrat supporters (like college students or welfare recipients), vote for the Democrat.

If you support the police, vote Republican.

If you support Biden's Justice Department Gestapo ONLY BECAUSE they harass, intimidate, and persecute Trump supporters, vote Democrat.

If you think WE THE PEOPLE should run the government, vote Republican.

If you think the CCP (The Chinese Communist Party), unelected bureaucrats, and Susan Rice should run the government, vote Democrat.

If you believe that America is a Republic based on Constitutional rights, vote for Republicans.

If you think that America is a Democracy (majority or mob rules), vote for Democrats.

If your heroes are Ronald Reagan, George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Donald Trump, you may tend to vote Republican.

If you think America is hopelessly racist and all statues and monuments should be torn down and replaced with statues of Communist dictators, vote Democrat.

If you want a closed Southern border, and only accept immigrants who will contribute to the American melting pot, vote Republican.

If you would rather have an open border, allowing traffickers, drug dealers, and other violent foreign criminals to overrun the country, vote Democrat.

SEE YOU AT THE POLLS ON NOVEMEBR 8TH................

An RSR Exclusive: We Called John Fetterman Supporters

According to some recent polls, untra-leftist stroke victim Democrat candidate John Fetterman STILL leads Republican Dr. Mehmet Oz in the Pennsylvania Senate race.

We called 4,011 likely voters for Fetterman, and they told us why they were leaning towards the Democrat candidate. Here are the results:    

24% supported John Fetterman because he promised to let them and/or their violent criminal relatives or friends out of prison.

21% thought it was cool that John Fetterman dresses like a 9-year-old slob.

11% identified themselves as Communist or Bernie Sanders Socialist.

9% identified themselves as Philadelphia Eagles fans and admitted that they are just obnoxious, drunk, Democrat assholes.

9% of Fetterman supporters are also stroke victims, and they strongly identify with stroke victim John Fetterman.

7% say they hated The Dr. Oz Show.

5% have severe brain damage.

Nearly 97% also said that if someone wrapped a grapefruit in a Soviet flag, and delared the grapefruit a Democrat candidate for The U.S. Senate, they would gladly vote for the grapefruit.

3% thought they were supporting The Monster from Young Frankenstein.

HEADLINE: SENILE ECONOMIC ILLITERATE ORDERS GAS STATIONS TO LOWER PRICE OF GAS

                           

Our Resident Leftist Film Critic Reviews Top Gun: Maverick

Our resident leftist film critic Gerald Snotley returns with his review of Top Gun: Maverick:

Apparently, some people haven't got the memo that America has seen it's better days. In Top Gun: Maverick, ultra-cocky Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell (portrayed by Tom Cruz) returns to train a team of equally-cocky, new Top Gun superstars. 

Their mission is to destroy a uranium enrichment plant located somewhere in the Middle-East (I'm pretty sure they mean Iran) defended with surface-to-air missiles and advanced (5th generation) fighter jets

I didn't see woke Generals Mark Milley or Lloyd Austin anywhere in this story. There were no mention of preferred pronouns or gender-reassignment surgery or anything like that.  There were a shocking number of White men in this movie, and they didn't seem to be full of 'White Rage.' 

I am guessing all these Top Gunners voted for Trump.

I saw White pilots, Black pilots, and a woman pilot, yet nobody dwelled on the racism or sexism of American society. The only thing that seemed to matter to these people was 'being the very best.' 

What's wrong with these people?????

In one early scene, we meet the new generation of insufferably cocky young Top Guns, as they play pool at a local bar owned by Maverick's love interest, played by Jennifer Conneley. Extremely cocky and annoyingly handsome Hangman (Glen Powell) plays his favorite song on the jukebox, 1976 neanderthal rawker 'Slow Ride' by Foghat. Gerald Ford was the President when this rediculous song was a hit.

Nobody played any tunes by Lizzo, Drake or Beyonce. Obviously, These hot shots are comfortable in their racism.

In the 1986 original Top Gun, Maverick loses his best friend Goose (played by Anthony Edwards) during a training accident. In this sequel, Goose's son (Rooster) wants to follow in his Dad's footsteps. Rooster sees Maverick as stifling his carrer, and Maverick doesn't want to order the son of his dead friend to be part of this deadly, risky mission.

I counted only two Black pilots among the characters. I was under the impression that in 'Woke America' all heroes in TV and film were Black and White men are all stupid villians. There's plenty of White privilege in this film. I wonder if the producers of this movie have ever heard of Groege Floyd.

In another scene, Maverick visits his ailing comrade 'Iceman', portrayed by Val Kilmer. Iceman now looks a little like Stephen Hawking. Later on, Iceman dies from his illness, and Maverick eulogizes him in front pf an American flag. 

There's no way Our ChiCom masters will allow this scene on movie screens in China.

In one extremely cool scene, Maverick gains the respect of his young charges by taking part in a simulated training dogfight, and he shoots everybody out of the sky, one-by-one. We hear the theme song of C.S.I.: Miami blasting out as he blasts all the young pups away. 

When a pilot gets 'killed' they have to do 200 push-ups. None of these young Top Guns cried to the Generals, and never acted emotionally or psychologically damaged. They all carried themselves with a fun sense of pride and good-natured cockiness.

I hate them. They are everything I'm not!

The mission itself reminds me of the mission against The Death Star in the  original  Star Wars Success  would take a miracle. It was determined that Maverick would be leading the team. He picks Rooster to take part in this dangerous mission.

In another interesting scene, Maverick conducts a team-building exercise on the beach, as the hotshots play football with two footballs in play, Both teams simultaneously play offence AND defence at the same time. Nobody knelt in protest of police brutality, and Colin Kaepernick wasn't invited to play. I was totally offended.

I'm not going to spoil the ending, but I will say that I can imagine right-wing, patriotic moviegoers jumping to their feet and cheering like Tom Cruz on Oprah's couch!

As a dyspeptic leftist beta-male, I would hate to say that I loved this movie, so I won't. 

I am Gerald Snotley, and this is Snotley At The Movies. Back to you, RedSquirrel.

Top Ten Democrat October Surprises

The midterm polls look terrible for the panicking Democrats, so it's about time for Team Democrat to reach into their bag of Dirty Election Tricks. From the home office in Wilmer, Minnesota, here are the Top Ten Democrat October Surprises:

10. The Biden Gestapo arrest the entire Trump family (even teenaged son Barron), and perp-walk them to one of Biden's secret prisons. Later, Biden makes ANOTHER Hitlerian speech, screaming about 'domestic terrorist' MAGA Republicans destroying the country.

  9. Biden orders the F.B.I. to burn down The White House, like The Reichstag. He blames The Proud Boys, and charges them with insurrection, along with hundreds of Trump voters.

  8. The F.B.I. stage a fake kidnapping of Speaker Nancy Pelosi. Dozens of pro-Trump patsies are arrested and jailed.

  7. Biden threatens to resign and have Kamala Harris installed as President.

  6. The CDC announces a new pandemic, shuts down the country again, and announce that everyone has to vote from home. They don't send ballots to 20,000,000 registered Republicans.

  5. The DNC leak fake news reports about several GOP Senate candidates having driven drunk, and falsely charge the candidates tried to cover up their 'drunk driving' charges.

  4. Democrat D.A.'s charge several Repblican Governors with 'trafficking' after the governors bus illegals to liberal 'sanctuary' cities.

  3. Biden announces nationwide  'Free $0.00 gas' for college students and early voters. The 'free' gas will be paid for by hard-working taxpayers from Red States.

  2. Democrat incumbents introduce the 'Free Money For Everybody' Act, board helicopters and literally throw $1000 bills out of the windows. 

  1. The Democrats send $50,000 'stimulus' checks to every American.....and $1,000,000 checks for every illegal alien.