The Maryland Man

The following is moreless an actual mainstream news account on the illegal alien Kilmar Abrego Garcia, who was sent home to El Salvador:

A Maryland Man, named KIlmar Abrego Garcia was mistakenly sent back to his home in El Salvador. The Maryland Man is a member of the South American gang MS-13, and the Maryland Man has been discovered to be in the country illegally, but we in the mainstream news media call him 'Maryland Man.'

The Maryland Man is accused of domestic abuse by his former wife, and The Maryland Man has MS-13 tattoos on his knuckles,  The Maryland Man was sent back to El Salvador, and Maryland Democrat Chris Van Hollen visited with The Maryland Man. 

Senator Van Hollen wants to bring Maryland Man back to Maryland. After all, he's The Maryland Man.

The Maryland Man wants a court to rule in his favor, because The Maryland Man fears for his life. The Maryland Man's life is in danger because of dangerous rival gangs. Maryland Man's life will remain in danger if he isn't allowed to return to Maryland, man.

Judge Stephen Boesman is demanding that President Trump's Immigration Czar Tom Homan bring Maryland Man Kilmer Abrego Garcia back to Maryland because even though he IS in the country illegally, he remains The Maryland Man.

We at CNN, MSNBC, THE NETWORKS, AND LOCAL NEWS rarely refer to dangerous illegal aliens and criminals from foreign lands by their real names because it sounds better to call these perps MARYLAND MAN, MINNESOTA MAN, OR NEW YORK MAN instead of MOHAMMED AHMED MOHAMMED OR KILMAR ABREGO GARCIA.

We call him MARYLAND MAN to make it sound like HE BELONGS HERE. He could have been BORN here. We refer  to him as MARYLAND MAN because many illegals commit murder and rape, engage in human trafficking, and sell drugs, but MARYLAND MAN WOULD NEVER DO THAT, In fact, MARYLAND MAN is probably a victim.........OF THAT BIGOTED XENOPHOBE DONALD TRUMP!!!

We here at CNN, MSNBC, and the LOCAL NEWS NEED Maryland Man to return to Maryland because Democrats NEED Maryland Man's VOTE! We only seek DUE PROCESS for Maryland Man because violent third-world gangs are THE DEMOCRAT VOTER BASE!

We here at CNN and MSNBC are SHOCKED....SHOCKED!!!!! that NAZI Trump would DARE to send illegal alien Maryland Man back to his home country!

'Here to explain Maryland Man's plight is Maryland Man's lawyer and a judge who was recently bribed by a South American drug gang...........'