Tuesday is Cinco de Mayo, and our friends at The Mayo Clinic would like to remind everyone that Cinco de Mayo is the day you should check the freshness of the mayonnaise in your refrigerator.
If your mayonnaise smells or tastes rancid or spoiled, just dump the spoiled mayo down the cinco.
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The fans of, descendents of, admirers of, and families of Martin Luther King, The King of Rock And Roll (Elvis Presley), Evelyn ''Champaigne'' King, Alan King, Billie Jean King, 'King'' (Labron) James, King Diamond, King Vitamin, If I was The King of the world, King Harvest, King Kong, The ''King of Country'' George Strait, heavy metal band King Kobra, Nat King Cole, the rock band King's X, The Sacramento KIngs, The Los Angeles Kings, The King of the Night Time World, I took her to the hotel and she said ''You're the king'', Burger King, King Arthur, King James, King Louis, KIng Phillip, KIng David, King Henry the Eighth, King Tut, King Kamehameha, King Harald V, King Carl XVI Gustaf, The King of Diamonds, The King of Hearts, The King of Clubs, The King of Spades, King Frederik X, KIng Kong Bundy, King Hippo, King Montezuma, The King of the Jungle, Benny Goodman (The King of Swing), The King of the Road, King Nicolaus, King Nebuchadnezzer, The King of Saud, King Crimson, The King Biscuit Flower Hour, AND KIng Othello
would like to know why you're so intolerant of ''All Kings''. What did THEY ever do to you?
Get the bug out of your ass, you intolerant communist lunatics.
Heh, heh, heh.......I just flew in from New York City. Actually, I didn't fly. NYC is run by communist mohammadon stooge Zohran Mamdani, SO I HAD TO RIDE IN A HORSE-DRAWN HAY-WAGON 400 miles. Don't worry about me, though. I felt the warmness of collectivsm SURROUNDED BY all that hay!
Before Mamdani was elected, bread waited for you. Now, you'll stand in line just for toilet paper when Mamdani opens his city-run grocery stores in 2029! Heh, heh, heh. Hooray for collectivism!
I saw May Day parade and the bolsheviks were yelling ''WORKERS OVER BILLIONAIRES!!!'' In Soviet Union and Minneapolis, the only rich people were oligarchs, Somali fraudsters and party members, while the workers are DEFRAUDED and their taxes raised. Many ''lucky''workers won't have to worry about taxes anymore when the $15 minimum wage destroys their job.
In Soviet Russia, we had The KGB. In Minnesota, you had Tim Walz's Covid Snitch LIne. These protesters act like they're the Polish underground resistance or something. SILLY LITTLE, AMERICA-HATING BOLSHEVIKS!!!
I also saw the ''No Kings'' protests A FEW WEEKS AGO, and I was wondering what do these protestors have against the King of Rock n' Roll Elvis Presley, Billy Jean King, and MARTIN LUTHER KING????? WHAT????
These crazy protestors REALLY hate PRESIDENT TRUMP. Did THEY ALL GET FIRED on ''The Apprentice'' or something? They freely and loudly call him NAZI AND HITLER. They carry signs and yell, yet HE SENDS nobody to concentration camp or prison work camp. Trump must be the WORST DICTATOR EVER!!!
Today the government school teachers marched. If you can read, thank a teacher or your parents. If you CAN'T read, thank a teacher's union! These teachers took their students out of class and brought THEIR FUTURE COMMUNIST AGITATORS to the march.
The government schools have stopped teaching ''reading and writing'', and replaced it with ''revolutions and rioting!'' These green-haired, commie teachers do such an amazing job at these LEARING CENTERS!!! Heh, heh, heh......What a SYSTEM!!!!
It's absolutely wild that billionaire Communist Democrat sugar daddies like George Soros finances these hate-filled, anti-American protests to destroy the country that allows them to protest freely in the FIRST PLACE!!!
WHAT A COUNTRY!!!!!!Heh, heh, heh..............
''We will replace the frigidity of rugged individualism with the warmth of collectivism''---New York Mayor Zohran Mamdani
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For my Somali supporters, leftist lunatics and violent UNDOCUMENTED MIGRANTS, THE STATE OF THE STATE IS STRONG!!!! For the rest of you, NOT SO MUCH!!!
Under my RULE, THE STATE OF MINNESOTA HAS EXPERIENCED A TAKE-OVER BY COMMUNISTS, CORRUPTOCRATS, CRIMINALS, CROOKS, CREEPS, AND CROSS-DRESSERS!!!! We have allowed violent ''UNDOCUMENTED IMMIGRANTS' and carjackers to run rampant!!!! The Democrat Trifecta has made the North Star State UNRECOGNIZABLE!!!!!
We passed the most extrme Abortion law IN THE WORLD, and made child mutilation EVERY CHILD'S RIGHT!!!!
I shut the state down for Covid and started my COVID SNITCH LINE. i SURRENDERED THE STREETS OF MINNEAPOLIS TO THE RIOTERS, AND LET THEM BURN DOWN THE CITY!!
We Democrats REWARDED our Somali friends by letting them ROB THE TAXPAYERS, STARTING WITH THE FEEDING OUR FRAUD / BLEEDING OUR TAXPAYERS LEGISLATION!!!! Then, we did away with the ''racist'' old Minnesota State Flag and INTRODUCED A NEW STATE FLAG THAT LOOKS A LOT LIKE THE FLAG OF SOMALILAND.
Because of me and the 80,000+ Somali migrants imported into the city of Minneapolis, OUR STATE UNDER MY WATCH HAS BEEN TRANSFORMED INTO A CRIME-RIDDEN, CORRUPT SATELITE OF SOMALIA!!!! HEAR, HEAR!!!!!!
Minnesota is and always will be a SANCTUARY STATE!!!! The NAZI in The White House sent HIS GESTAPO to arrest and deport OUR NEIGHBORS FROM Central and South America, but I TELL YOU THIS....
WE ARE THE DEMOCRATS, AND WE DON'T HAVE TO OBEY YOUR SILLY, LITTLE FEDERAL LAWS!!!!!
I WAS SO PROUD OF OUR ''NO KINGS'' RALLIES, WHERE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF OUR AFFLUENT-WHITE-FEMALE-LEFTIST NEIGHBORS PROTESTED AGAINST ''KINGS'', AND MANY OF THE SAME PEOPLE RECENTLY WELCOMED ENGLAND'S KING CHARLES FOR HIS AMERICAN VISIT!!! HIP, HIP, HOORAY!!!!! SOME KINGS ARE ACCEPTABLE!!!!
We rioted to distract everyone from my rampant corruption and incompetence, and it looks like I will make it to the end of my second term. In fact, my GREATEST accomplishment is that I've somehow avoided prison!!!!
As you all know, I've decided to not seek a third term. The NAZI in The White House is investigating ME. Other than 8 long , painful years of corruption, THEY'VE GOT NOTHING ON ME!!!! THEY JUST HAVE THEIR STUPID RED HATS!!!!
Before I was elected in 2018, Minnesota led the nation in education, health care, and economic developement. NOW, WE LEAD THE NATION IN CORRUPTION AND FUNDING TERRORISM.
Our schools USED TO excel in ''reading and writing'', and now we lead in ''REVOLUTION AND RIOTING''.
As I leave office, I promise to pretend to fight fraud, and keep on bad-mouthing and threatening bodily harm to my opponents BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT MY UNHINGED, AMERICA-HATING VOTER BASE DEMANDS!!!
THANK YOU.....AND TO ALL YOU REPUBLICAN NAZIs, SCREW YOU!!!!!!
Two days before lunatic Cole Tomas Allen attempted to assassinate members of The Trump Administration at The White House Correspondent's Dinner, late-night host Jimmy Kimmel made a hateful joke suggesting that First Lady Melania Trump ''had the glow like an expectant widow.''
We asked an everyday American, Garth Algar, what he thought of the joke, and this is what he said:
''If Jimmy Kimmel Live! were an ice cream flavor, it would be PRALINES......AND DOUCHE.....
...........WITHOUT THE PRALINES......."
We despise the rich but we love our graft
We worship Obama, he saved healthcare, yeah!
We hate guns but love murder
We hate free speech and love indoctrination
When we lose we go crazy!
What it all boils down to, is Trump drives us out of our mind, mind, minds
We got our hands in your pocket, to fund our NGO's
We are drunk when we're in power
We voted for Mamdani because we want free stuff
It isn't greed when we take your money
We care, unlike those G.O.P. NAZIs
We're guilty of what we accuse you of doing
and we NEVER have to say ''We're sorry''
What it boils down to, is that we can always LIE, LIE, LIE
We got our hands in your pocket, we give your stuff to our illegal alien voters
(INSTRUMENTAL BREAK)
What it all comes down to
The government should run your life
We got our hands in your pocket, and your paycheck belongs to us
We want free stuff and we're focused
Our green agenda will save the world
We'll stop those oil companies
America's enemies are laughing
We are loyal, but we are traitors too
Liberalism is a mental disorder
And what it all boils down to
We're looney hyp....o.....crites
We got our hands in your pocket
and we're playing you like a stradivarias
And what it all comes down to, my friends, yeah
If you complain we will call you names
We got our hands in your pocket
You will go to jail if you don't pay your taxes
