Saturday, May 9, 2026

Which State Flag Do REAL Minnesotans Choose??


Two years ago, the Minnesota DFL added insult to injury after their trifecta of communist loons passed the most extreme, Moloch-pleasing abortion law in human history. They squandered a huge surplus, and rewarded their CORRUPT Somali supporters, HELPING THEM rob and defraud the taxpayers on a massive scale. Their Somali supporters REWARDED them back by keeping them in power.

To top it off, some of their woke ''experts'' changed the state flag. The classic state flag was ''deemed racist'' because an American Indian was depicted on a horse. So, the leftist radicals in charge of the state threw out our classic Minnesota state flag IN FAVOR OF a new flag that bears a striking similarity to the Somaliland flag. 

Recently, about 2 dozen small towns across Minnesota voted to refuse to fly the new flag and to keep the classic flag THAT SELF-RESPECTING MINNESOTANS PREFER. The communist-DFL responded by introducing legislation to deny these small towns state aid. To these CROOKED leftist corruptocrats, surrendering the state to their Somali masters is mandatory, AND YOU OUT-STATE ''COW AND ROCK'' TOWNS HAD BETTER SURRENDER YOUR TOWN OR ELSE!!!!

When Governor Walz introduced the new flag, he did it in the most performative, OBNOXIOUS AND IN YOUR FACE  way imaginable. NO NORMAL, SELF-RESPECTING MINNESOTAN WAS CONSULTED DURING THE RIDICULOUS PROCESS. It almost seems as if Tampon Timmy was out to HUMILIATE his NORMAL, EVERYDAY opposition and make people feel HELPLESS.

Your bushy-tailed pundit is beginning to think that the new flag symbolizes the DFL's corrupt idea that Minnesota really BELONGS to the ultra-corrupt nation of Somalia. The Democrats gave the state to East African criminals, allowing them to rob the state clean, and in return, the Somalis agreed to keep these corrupt Democrats in power. I wonder if Walz, Flanagan and their allies see Minnesota as Somalia's communist satelite state or part of The United States of America.

On the classic state flag, there's a light-skinned farmer tending to a farmfield and a native-American on a horse. The communist DFLers found this offensive, so they opted for a flag that says nothing while looking like a Somali flag. There is a white shape on the new flag that is either a star or a gaping ''hole''. 

Maybe it symbolizes THE Minnesota taxpayer or something. We know the Democrats ENJOY screwing taxpayers as well as pandering to sodomites.

The color of the new flag is mostly a weak, non-descript blueish-green. I can only guess that it's a mixture symbolizing ''blue-state'' and ''environmentalist kook''-green.

There are some of us who would like to see a referendum on the 2026 Minnesota state ballot asking the voters to choose their flag, but with dozens of out-state towns refusing the new state flag and flying the classic state flag, perhaps we won't need a referendum. Rural and Suburban Minnesota towns like the old flag and the ultra-corrupt, LARGELY-FOREIGN urban center prefers flying a flag that looks  foreign.

I look forward to a time when Minnesotans will begin to see themselves as Americans again, and not a stranger in their own country or under the heel of corrupt Democrats and third-world pirates.




''Wayne's World'' Would Never Happen Now


In 1992, popular Saturday Night Live skit ''Wayne's World'' was made into a hit movie. The story features Mike Meyers as Wayne Campbell and Dana Carvey as his pal Garth Algar, two rockin' dudes having fun and starring in their most excellent public access TV show. 

I was just wondering how different it would be if they tried to film this movie in 2026.


The 1992 movie starts with young Chicago TV producer Benjamin Kane (Rob Lowe) laying in bed with a beautiful redhead. They are channel surfing when she turns it on to the public access TV channel. Her face lights up as she and Benjamin watch her favorite local PUBLIC ACCESS TV show featuring two hilarious, rockin' dudes. Benjamin believes he has found a TV show that he can sell to Noah Vanderhoff, the millionaire owner of a local chain of video game arcades. (REMEMBER VIDEO ARCADES?)

In the 2026 version, young men and women don't date, go out or have sex, so this version begins in the basement of Benji's parents house. He is a part-time doordash driver, mostly-unemployed internet enterpreneur, and he's stting alone in his underwear, watching YouTube. 

In the 2026 version, Wayne's World isn't a Public Access TV show. Instead, it's a YouTube reaction channel. Wayne and Garth's enjoy reacting to horror movies. Tonight's movie reaction is the 1968 horror classic, ''Night Of The Living Dead''. Garth is traumatized and Benjamin is amused.

Tonight's reaction video got a good number of video views and Wayne is in his parent's basement in HIS underwear checking out the comment section. Some of the comments are quite funny.

In the 1992 version, Wayne, Garth, and two buddies take ''The Mirth Mobile'' out on the town, They are playing ''Bohemian Rhapsody'' on the car's tape deck while headbanging to the beat. They go to Stan Mikita's Donuts, an eatery open 24 hours a day and it's managed by a local psychopath Glen. (played by Ed O'Neil).

Then they hit The GasWorks, a nightclub, where Wayne is quite enamored with the beautiful, exotic-looking singer-bassplayer on the stage. SCHWING!!!! It's Saturday night, and Wayne and his buds are having fun.

In the 2026 version, Wayne calls doordash and orders a pizza. Except for his YouTube channel, Wayne's life is miserable and boring. In the 1992 version, Wayne wears a ''Wayne's World'' baseball cap. In the 2026 version, Wayne wears a man-bun. Ewwww.

In the 1992 version, Wayne's love interest Cassandra, (played by Tia Carrere) is an ambitious, budding rock star. In the 2026 GENERATION Z version, Cassandra is either a member of a K-POP singing group or an obnoxious, 300-pound street protestor who hates Donald Trump. There are very few actual rock bands existing in 2026.

In the 1992 version, Wayne learns Cantonese, the language of his love interest CASSANDRA. In THE 2026 version, Wayne learns how hard it is to navigate LinketIn, where potential employers demand ''potential employees'' work without officially ever being employed or paid. He learns that most CEOs and job recruiters are psychopaths. Wayne goes back to his ''Joe Job''.

In the 1992 version, Benjamin exploits Wayne and Garth, but at least he pays them $5,000 first. In the 2026 version, Benjamin persuades Wayne and Garth to monetize their YouTube channel. They make a whopping 27.12.

In the 1992 version of Wayne's World, Wayne and Garth go to see Alice Cooper in Milwaukee, They have backstage passes and are excited to meet their hero. In the 2026 version, Benjamin gives them tickets to see Doja Kat. They leave after about 3 songs.

In the 1992 version, the conniving Benjamin tries to steal Cassandra away from Wayne, impressing her by speaking Cantonese and offering to produce her music video. Cassandra makes the video in a sexy jungle pelt and a snake draped over her.

In the 2026 version, Benjamin doesn't even like girls. Cassandra makes a lyric video and dedicates it to The MeToo Movement. If anyone dared suggest Cassandra shoot a video in a sexy jungle pelt she would sue them for HARRASSMENT.

Wayne's World 2026 couldn't happen now. People rarely go out and women are wondering where all the men have gone.

 Men don't ask girls out because when one tries, he is publicly humiliated.  If Wayne's World was filmed now it would be either the shortest, most boring, sad movie ever made or it would be quite unrealistic.

As for your bushy-tailed correspondent, he would rather live in Wayne's World than the world of 2026.

Sunday, May 3, 2026

NEWS YOU CAN USE FROM THE MAYO CLINIC: CHECK YOUR MAYONNAISE


Tuesday is Cinco de Mayo, and our friends at The Mayo Clinic would like to remind everyone that Cinco de Mayo is the day you should check the freshness of the mayonnaise in your refrigerator.

If your mayonnaise smells or tastes rancid or spoiled, just dump the spoiled mayo down the cinco.

A QUESTION FOR THE ''NO KING'S'' CROWD


Dear ''No Kings'' protestors,

The fans of, descendents of, admirers of, and families of Martin Luther King, The King of Rock And Roll (Elvis Presley), Evelyn ''Champaigne'' King, Alan King, Billie Jean King, 'King'' (Labron) James, King Diamond, King Vitamin, If I was The King of the world, King Harvest, King Kong, The ''King of Country'' George Strait, heavy metal band King Kobra, Nat King Cole, the rock band King's X, The Sacramento KIngs, The Los Angeles Kings, The King of the Night Time World, I took her to the hotel and she said ''You're the king'', Burger King, King Arthur, King James, King Louis, KIng Phillip, KIng David, King Henry the Eighth, King Tut, King Kamehameha, King Harald V, King Carl XVI Gustaf, The King of Diamonds, The King of Hearts, The King of Clubs, The King of Spades, King Frederik X, KIng Kong Bundy, King Hippo, King Montezuma,  The King of the Jungle, Benny Goodman (The King of Swing), The King of the Road, King Nicolaus, King Nebuchadnezzer, The King of Saud, King Crimson, The King Biscuit Flower Hour, AND KIng Othello

would like to know why you're so intolerant of ''All Kings''. What did THEY ever do to you?



Get the bug out of your ass, you intolerant communist lunatics.

Saturday, May 2, 2026

A May Day Message From Yakov Smirnoff


Here to comment on May Day  is Russian comedian Yakov Smirnoff. Take it away:


Heh, heh, heh.......I just flew in from New York City. Actually, I didn't fly. NYC is run by communist mohammadon stooge Zohran Mamdani, SO I HAD TO RIDE IN A HORSE-DRAWN HAY-WAGON 400 miles. Don't worry about me, though. I felt the warmness of collectivsm SURROUNDED BY all that hay!

Before Mamdani was elected, bread waited for you. Now, you'll stand in line just for toilet paper when Mamdani opens his city-run grocery stores in 2029! Heh, heh, heh. Hooray for collectivism!

I saw May Day parade and the bolsheviks were yelling ''WORKERS OVER BILLIONAIRES!!!'' In Soviet Union and Minneapolis, the only rich people were oligarchs, Somali fraudsters and party members, while the workers are DEFRAUDED  and their taxes raised. Many ''lucky''workers won't have to worry about taxes anymore when the $15 minimum wage destroys their job.

In Soviet Russia, we had The KGB. In Minnesota, you had Tim Walz's Covid Snitch LIne. These protesters act like they're the Polish underground resistance or something. SILLY LITTLE, AMERICA-HATING BOLSHEVIKS!!! 

I also saw the ''No Kings'' protests A FEW WEEKS AGO, and I was wondering what do these protestors have against the King of Rock n' Roll Elvis Presley, Billy Jean King, and MARTIN LUTHER KING????? WHAT????

These crazy protestors REALLY hate PRESIDENT TRUMP. Did THEY ALL GET FIRED on ''The Apprentice'' or something? They freely and loudly call him NAZI AND HITLER. They carry signs and yell, yet HE SENDS nobody to concentration camp or prison work camp. Trump must be the WORST DICTATOR EVER!!!

Today the government school teachers marched. If you can read, thank a teacher or your parents. If you CAN'T read, thank a teacher's union! These teachers took their students out of class and brought THEIR FUTURE COMMUNIST AGITATORS to the march.

 The government schools have stopped teaching ''reading and writing'', and replaced it with ''revolutions and rioting!'' These green-haired, commie teachers do such an amazing job at these LEARING CENTERS!!! Heh, heh,  heh......What a SYSTEM!!!!

It's absolutely wild that billionaire Communist Democrat sugar daddies like George Soros finances these hate-filled, anti-American protests to destroy the country that allows them to protest freely in the FIRST PLACE!!! 

WHAT A COUNTRY!!!!!!Heh, heh, heh..............


Friday, May 1, 2026

HAPPY MAY DAY 2026

 ''We will replace the frigidity of rugged individualism with the warmth of collectivism''---New York Mayor Zohran Mamdani






Wednesday, April 29, 2026

Minnesota Governor Walz's Final State Of The State Speech

 


Last night, Minnesota Governor Tim Walz delivered his final State of the State Address:


For my Somali supporters, leftist lunatics and violent UNDOCUMENTED MIGRANTS,  THE STATE OF THE STATE IS STRONG!!!! For the rest of you, NOT SO MUCH!!!

Under my RULE, THE STATE OF MINNESOTA HAS EXPERIENCED A TAKE-OVER BY COMMUNISTS, CORRUPTOCRATS, CRIMINALS, CROOKS, CREEPS, AND CROSS-DRESSERS!!!! We have allowed violent ''UNDOCUMENTED IMMIGRANTS' and carjackers to run rampant!!!! The Democrat Trifecta has made the North Star State UNRECOGNIZABLE!!!!!

We passed the most extrme Abortion law IN THE WORLD, and made child mutilation EVERY CHILD'S RIGHT!!!!

I shut the state down for Covid and started my COVID SNITCH LINE. i SURRENDERED THE STREETS  OF MINNEAPOLIS TO THE RIOTERS, AND LET THEM BURN DOWN THE CITY!!

We Democrats REWARDED our Somali friends by letting them ROB THE TAXPAYERS, STARTING WITH THE FEEDING OUR FRAUD / BLEEDING OUR TAXPAYERS LEGISLATION!!!! Then, we did away with the ''racist'' old Minnesota State Flag and INTRODUCED A NEW STATE FLAG THAT LOOKS A LOT LIKE THE FLAG OF SOMALILAND.

Because of me and the 80,000+ Somali  migrants imported into the city of Minneapolis, OUR STATE UNDER MY WATCH HAS BEEN TRANSFORMED INTO A CRIME-RIDDEN, CORRUPT SATELITE OF SOMALIA!!!! HEAR, HEAR!!!!!!

Minnesota is and always will be a SANCTUARY STATE!!!! The NAZI in The White House sent HIS GESTAPO to arrest and deport OUR NEIGHBORS FROM Central and South America, but I TELL YOU THIS....

WE ARE THE DEMOCRATS, AND WE DON'T HAVE TO OBEY YOUR SILLY, LITTLE FEDERAL LAWS!!!!!

I WAS SO PROUD OF OUR ''NO KINGS'' RALLIES, WHERE TENS OF THOUSANDS OF OUR AFFLUENT-WHITE-FEMALE-LEFTIST NEIGHBORS PROTESTED AGAINST ''KINGS'', AND MANY OF THE SAME PEOPLE RECENTLY WELCOMED ENGLAND'S KING CHARLES FOR HIS AMERICAN VISIT!!! HIP, HIP, HOORAY!!!!! SOME KINGS ARE ACCEPTABLE!!!!

We rioted to distract everyone from my rampant corruption and incompetence, and it looks like I will make it to the end of my second term. In fact, my GREATEST accomplishment is that I've somehow avoided prison!!!!

As you all know, I've decided to not seek a third term. The NAZI in The White House is investigating ME. Other than 8 long , painful years of corruption, THEY'VE GOT NOTHING ON ME!!!! THEY JUST HAVE THEIR STUPID RED HATS!!!!

Before I was elected in 2018, Minnesota led the nation in education, health care, and economic developement. NOW, WE LEAD THE NATION IN CORRUPTION AND FUNDING TERRORISM.

Our schools USED TO excel in ''reading and writing'', and now we lead in ''REVOLUTION AND RIOTING''.

As I leave office, I promise to pretend to fight fraud, and keep on bad-mouthing and threatening bodily harm to my opponents BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT MY UNHINGED, AMERICA-HATING VOTER BASE DEMANDS!!!

THANK YOU.....AND TO ALL YOU REPUBLICAN NAZIs, SCREW YOU!!!!!!