This Or That

All-American hero Davy Crockett, or

Ghetto trash-talking Texas Representative Jasmine Crockett

The Maryland Man

The following is moreless an actual mainstream news account on the illegal alien Kilmar Abrego Garcia, who was sent home to El Salvador:

A Maryland Man, named KIlmar Abrego Garcia was mistakenly sent back to his home in El Salvador. The Maryland Man is a member of the South American gang MS-13, and the Maryland Man has been discovered to be in the country illegally, but we in the mainstream news media call him 'Maryland Man.'

The Maryland Man is accused of domestic abuse by his former wife, and The Maryland Man has MS-13 tattoos on his knuckles,  The Maryland Man was sent back to El Salvador, and Maryland Democrat Chris Van Hollen visited with The Maryland Man. 

Senator Van Hollen wants to bring Maryland Man back to Maryland. After all, he's The Maryland Man.

The Maryland Man wants a court to rule in his favor, because The Maryland Man fears for his life. The Maryland Man's life is in danger because of dangerous rival gangs. Maryland Man's life will remain in danger if he isn't allowed to return to Maryland, man.

Judge Stephen Boesman is demanding that President Trump's Immigration Czar Tom Homan bring Maryland Man Kilmer Abrego Garcia back to Maryland because even though he IS in the country illegally, he remains The Maryland Man.

We at CNN, MSNBC, THE NETWORKS, AND LOCAL NEWS rarely refer to dangerous illegal aliens and criminals from foreign lands by their real names because it sounds better to call these perps MARYLAND MAN, MINNESOTA MAN, OR NEW YORK MAN instead of MOHAMMED AHMED MOHAMMED OR KILMAR ABREGO GARCIA.

We call him MARYLAND MAN to make it sound like HE BELONGS HERE. He could have been BORN here. We refer  to him as MARYLAND MAN because many illegals commit murder and rape, engage in human trafficking, and sell drugs, but MARYLAND MAN WOULD NEVER DO THAT, In fact, MARYLAND MAN is probably a victim.........OF THAT BIGOTED XENOPHOBE DONALD TRUMP!!!

We here at CNN, MSNBC, and the LOCAL NEWS NEED Maryland Man to return to Maryland because Democrats NEED Maryland Man's VOTE! We only seek DUE PROCESS for Maryland Man because violent third-world gangs are THE DEMOCRAT VOTER BASE!

We here at CNN and MSNBC are SHOCKED....SHOCKED!!!!! that NAZI Trump would DARE to send illegal alien Maryland Man back to his home country!

'Here to explain Maryland Man's plight is Maryland Man's lawyer and a judge who was recently bribed by a South American drug gang...........'

The RedSquirrel's Earth Day Address

Earth Day Greetings

As you may know, Tuesday was Earth Day. Here in Minneapolis, the weather was moreless beautiful. It was partly cloudy and partly sunny. It's been a chilly Spring here, yet I haven't heard anybody complain about the weather. 

On Earth Day, I like to watch George Carlin's contrarian classic  'Saving the Earth' routine on YouTube, I thought about how good the weather usually is here when it isn't 20 below. I estimate that I will step outside about 400 times a year, and about half of those times I will think to myself 'Dang, this weather is terrific!' Even when it's rainy and sloppy, I know that we need those days too because the farmers need the rain. 

During the cold Winter weather months, I enjoy those 30/40 degree days, and think to myself 'If this is global warming, then GIVE ME MORE.' The leftists tell us that climate change is the biggest threat to the planet, although George Carlin told us 'The planet is just fine.'

I don't make billions of dollars selling carbon credits or global warming panic like Al Gore does. I'm too busy enjoying nature to be a Chicken Little worrying about how those rotten, rascally human beings keep destroying the world. I think that God wants us just to be good stewards and stop worrying.

WORRYING about climate change is something commies say they do, but NORMALS know it's a fake, fraudulent problem created by communist busybodies to take away our freedoms and punish the productive.

Every 10 years, The Chicken Littles tell us we are going to destroy our planet, and every10 years the planet keeps proving them wrong. Some of us ridicule their foolishness, but they keep coming back to tell us how we will ruin the planet.

They keep predicting doom, and most of the time, I notice that the weather may ACTUALLY BE GETTING BETTER (whatever that means). When are we going to tell those climate change alarmists who keep crying wolf to just 'SHUT UP!'?

Go ahead. Enjoy Earth Day. Enjoy EVERY day. It's pretty terrific out there.

An MS13-Democrat Easter Story

 

Good Friday Greetings, Normal Americans!

As we joyfully celebrate our Savior Jesus Christ rising from the dead this Easter, let us remember all the lost souls suffering from TDS. There are about 21% of the country still screaming at the sky and making TihTok videos crying about the re-election of Donald Trump, and we should also remember THEM as well as their FEEEEEELINGS.

THEY are freaking out over illegal alien MS-13 gangster Kilmar Albrego Garcia being sent .back to his home country El Salvador. Looney leftist Senator Chris Van Hollen (D-MD) took a trip to the Central-American country in the hopes that he can illegally bring Kilmar back to America.

Apparently, Van Hollen believes he still needs a lot of illegal aliens voting for him to win re-election. He doesn't meet with or care about Everyday Americans raped, murdered, or harmed by criminal illegal aliens.

Still, it seems UNFAIR to celebrate our saviour's VICTORY OVER DEATH while some lost souls are losing their minds over illegal aliens and the members of Congrab who represent THEM.

We here at RSR try to get everyone's point of view, even communist weidros, and so, we are pleased to present 'A COMMUNIST-DEMOCRAT EASTER STORY',

FROM THE 9TH CHAPTER OF THE BOOK OF KILMAR

1. In the days of The Supreme Court's ruling that illegal aliens can be sent back home, the wife-beating MS-13 illegal Alien gangster  Kilmar Albrego Garcia was arrested.

2. The Democrats felt betrayed by Black voters, Hispanic, voters, and young voters, but the extremists of The Party and the news media bitterly cried over Kilmar Albrego Garcia's removal

3. Tomhoman and Pambondi sent their ICE Centaurians to arrest Kilmar, and he was sent back to El Salvador.

4.  He cried 'OH, COMMUNIST-DEMOCRATS, WHY HAS THOU FORESAKEN ME????????

5. The leftist scribes at CNN, MSNBC, and the bone-headed District Judge Boesman made a fuss over KIlmar's repatriation.

6. Grand-standing Communist-Democrat Senator Chris Van Hollen took a break from grifting and ignoring his constituents and boarded an iron bird to retrieve Kilmar.

7. Meeting with Kilmar, Van Hollen enjoyed his photo-op, and said 'Let us drink Margaritas'  while El Salvodor's President NAYIB BUKELE ridiculed him, SAYING 'LOOK AT KILMAR! HE HAS BEEN RAISED FROM THE DEATH CAMP!'

8. The Leftists were left sad and angry when the MS-13 criminal aliens were not let back into The United States so that they could vote for Democrats. 

9. The Democrats cried and tore their garments, screaming 'If we can't get the illegal alien vote, HOW CAN WE EVER WIN THE MAJORITY IN CONGRESS???'

10. Perhaps, we can ask Chuck Schumer to threaten The Supreme Court. He can order them to let the undocumented gangs into the country, or these judges will REAP THE WHIRLWIND!!!

11. And the Communist Democrats agreed 'So it is written, So shall it be done!'

The Golden Douche Award Goes To Joe Biden

We at RSR present THE GOLDEN DOUCHE AWARD to senile, corrupt former president Joe Biden, the head of the Biden Crime Family who PARDONED THE BIDEN CRIME FAMILY....

....but that's old news.

We also know that Joe also conspired with ultra-corrupt prosecutors, ultra-corrupt judges, and leftist, out-of-control state attorney generals to have his chief political opponent Donald Trump sent to prison for life..... .....but that's old news.

I'm sure you also know that he allowed tens of thousands of third-world criminal aliens into the country because people with no loyalty to America and criminals make ideal Democrat voters....

...............but THAT'S old news.

BUT HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS???

When Elon Musk offered to rescue astronauts stranded in space, Rotten Joe refused to let him, because he FEARED that it would help Donald Trump win the November 5th presidential election.

It's hard to believe that someone so senile and so out of it can be so rotten and douchey.

Enjoy your award, Joe.

Sister Mary Brokenknuckles: What In The DEVIL Is Wrong With The Democrats In Minnesota???

Easter Week Greetings!

Thank GOD for divided government. On November 5, The Demonic Democrat Trifecta was broken as they lost their majority in Minnesota's State House. A few years back, The Democrats took the state's surplus and spent the state almost into deficet oblivion. The Moloch-worshipping Democrats also passed the most extreme abortion law in the country.

The House Republicans, led by Lisa Demuth, is fighting against the corruption eating the state alive, but ultra-corrupt, ultra leftist Democrats killed recent anti-corruption legislation. The Democrats in The State House were absent for much of the session, refusing to come to work for several weeks.

Meanwhile, it seems that somebody keeps letting the state's Satan worshippers install their satanic displays in the state capital building. The latest display gave a shout-out to Minnesota Governor Tm Walz.

Here to comment on all this is our Religion and Faith Correspondent, Sister Mary Brokenknuckles:

God Bless,

Mother of God, Full of Grace, please watch over and Bless The State of Minnesota. Please forgive the COMMUNIST heathen Democrats ruining the state!

I pray for the angels to watch over Speaker Lisa Demuth as she does legislative battle aganst Democrat criminals, communists, criminals and cross-dressers.

I pray that someone finds an exorcist for that lying False Prophet Tim Walz. What the DEVIL is wrong with him??? He acts like he has an Unclean Spirit within him!

Putting tampons in Boys' bathrooms????? Now he skips about, doing so-called 'townhalls', threatening to assault Republicans and cracking jokes about his demon-possessed supporters setting FIRE to Tesla electric cars! THEY NEED A RULER CRACKING DOWN ON THEIR KNUCKLES!!!

THESE DEMON=CRAZED LEFTISTS CARVE SWASTIKAS ON TESLAS. THEN call Elon Musk a NAZI??!! 

Dear God, would you please deport that evil heathen Ilhan Omar. She boasts that she represents Somalia......NOT MINNESOTA!!! DEAR LORD, WE DON'T WANT A THIRD-WORD,  INCESTUOUS, AMERICA-HATING FRAUD REPRESENTING US!!!

Speaking of corrupt Somalis, $250,000,000.00 was stolen from the taxpayers in the FEEDING OUR FUTURE/FRAUD program. Soon, we will have to build prisons just for Somalis stealing from the people of Minnesota. 

It would have been less expensive just to teach them 'Thou shalt not steal', but some devil-worshipping, communist judge would rule against The Ten Commandments. 

One of my prayers was recently answered, as Senator and Former Vice-President of Planned Parenthood Minnesota Tina Smith announced she will not be seeking re-election. It looks like she wants to spend more time with her 4, unaborted grand-children.

Finally, the satanists in Minnesota have been shoving their pentagrams and demonic imagery in our faces down at the state capitol. We are told that they are only exercising their First Amendment rights. 

They make us believe that these poor satanists are on the verge of having their free speech rights violated, when in fact, the state is already ran by Godless weirdos!

Dear God, I need to pray for this state. May God bless you and yours.

HEADLINE : MSNBC GIVES DISNEY'S SNOW WHITE RACHEL ZEGLER HER OWN SHOW

HEADLINE: MSNBC GIVES RACHEL ZEGLER HER OWN SHOW

Fresh off her Box Office disaster, MSNBC has announced that they will give Snow Woke's Rachel Zegler HER OWN show.

And why not?  She's obnoxious and extremely woke, and she also hates President Trump. She was given a role of a lifetime as the STAR of the live action Snow White movie, and the young pain-in-the-ass actress annoyed and offended fans of the classic 1937 animated Disney Classic.

She called the story 'dated', and said that she wanted to 'change' it. She referred to PRINCE CHARMING as 'the guy who stalked Snow White. Zegler RE-IMAGINED Snow White as a bossy military leader. 

The movie has gotten terrible reviews and will probably lose $200,000,000.00 

Your bushy-tailed media maven thinks it's a great idea for MSNBC to give Rachel Zegler her own show. I think she'll fit right in. She is a ideal replacement for bigoted, hateful race-baiting host Joy Reid.

I can imagine her opening monolougue:

(Announcer) Hello, welcome to The Snow Woke Show, wih Rachel Zegler.....

Rachel makes a face and shuffles her notes. She begins her monologue:

Donald Trump's cute, blonde Press Secretary Karoline Leavett remains happily married. I bet her husband stalked her. I bet he kisses her when she's sleeping. 

Rachel makes another face: WEIRD! WEIRD!!!!....

So, Trump says he might impose some tariffs on China. Such a 'dated' move......

On a personal note, my movie Snow White lost a lot of money. Apparently, the movie-watching public is just too 'old-fashioned' to go see my version of Snow White. They didn't want to see the improvements we made to their old-fashioned story. OLD FOGEYS!!!!

After a word from our sponsors, my first guest Kamala Harris will come on and we'll discuss how the patriarchy has ruined Hollywood and politics.

'WIERD! WIERD!!!'

HEADLINE: PRESIDENT TRUMP PICKS KID ROCK AS NEW SECRETARY OF BAWITDABA

 

Happy April Fool's Day : )