10 Questions We Would Love To See Eric Cartman Ask Jen Psaki

I would like to see Eric Cartman at a White House Press Briefing, asking the questions:
 

10. Could you ask the Vice President to kindly stop cackling like a hyena every time a reporter asks her a serious question?

   9. Do you even have a soul, you annoying AMERICA-HATING, Ginger commie bitch? 

   8. America has a 50-50 Senate and a tiny Democrat majority in the House. Why are the Democrats acting like corrupt, psychotic, commie douchebags?

    7. Do you agree that a presidential spokesperson who keeps saying 'We'll circle back around to that'  should be bitch-slapped mercilessly?

    6. Alright, WHAT THE LIVING HELL IS WRONG WITH THAT SENILE DUMB-ASS BIDEN????!!!!

    5. This question is in regards to Dr. Rachel Levin.....Is an overweight, fugly transgender he/she the right person at the Department of Health?s    

    4, Is it really the Biden regime's position that they will not support Voter ID yet support a NATIONAL VACCINE PASSPORT LAW??????

    3. Is Biden really taking credti for President Trump's Operation Warp Speed?

    2. I'm just gonna ask......Are the ChiComs in control here?

    1. When Biden resigns, will THE ANTICHRIST TAKE OVER AMERICA AND THE WORLD?

Nicolae Carpathia Delivers The 2021 State Of The Union

People are wondering why the current resident of the White House hasn't yet delivered a State of the Union Speech or even a press conference. Many people think that he shouldn't because he's not 'all there', and he probably isn't running the country anyways. 

Some people think Susan Rice and a gang of Democrat ultra-leftists are running the country behind the scenes, and others think that the Chinese communists are pulling the strings. Then, there's many people who see the current administration as Barack Obama's third term.

It sure feels like Obama's third term: America is weak, our enemies are flexing their muscles, and we're energy-dependent to countries that hate us. To those who hate America, it feels like the good 'ole days.

Here to deliver The State of The Union Address, is Nicolae Carpathia:

Dear Madame Speaker , Senate Majority Leader Schumer, Soon-to-be Madame President Harris

We are rid of Donald Trump, and The F.B.I. are arresting Trump supports left and right, so we have regained control! (Democrats applaud here).

Our subjects in Blue states are masked, and are recieving Covid (scare quotes)'vaccines'. Soon, millions will recieve ANAL SWABS just like our friends in Communist China! (Democrats cheer).

Soon, Americans who recieve a Covid shot will be issued 'Covid Passports', and will be allowed to travel inside the United States. Refuseniks risk arrest. (Democrats cheer wildly).

Our friends Twitter and Facebook are censoring conservative HATE SPEECH! (Democrats cheer wildly). Just a few days ago, Twitter censored that hater Newt Gingrich who tweeted that it's a bad idea to allow illegal aliens who haven't been tested for Covid into the country. (Democrats BOO! loudly).

My Democat underlings have passed the $1.9 trillion Covid Relief Bill. Soon, our people will be throwing billions of dollars out of helicopters in deep blue cities!  If you're a governor of a blue state or mayor of a deep-blue city, your bailout is on the way! (The Democrats cheer).

Our President Joe Biden is signing executive orders weakening America, and that's a good ting. A strong, free America is bad, but a weak America is what the world needs to institute 'The Great Reset.'(Democrats applaud).

The southern border is being overrun by drug dealers, child traffickers, and violent gangs. The good news is that they will be  voting for Democrats!!!!!(The Democrats cheer). 

Soon, we will be passing 'reasonable gun control laws'! (The Democrats applaud loudly). The President is toying with the idea of sending 'law enforcement officers' to houses suspected of possessing guns. (Democrats cheer).

Soon, The District of Columbia will become the 51st State, and we will have 2 MORE DEMOCRATS IN THE SENATE! (The Democrats cheer wildly).  Puerto Rico will become the 52nd State, and will be sending 2 SENATORS TO WASHINGTON DC STATE! (The Democrats cheer).

We also are passing legislation making it virtually impossible for Democrats TO LOSE A NATIONAL ELECTION EVER AGAIN!!! (The Democrats cheer loudly).

VERY SOON, WE WILL HAVE A GREAT, WORLDWIDE RESET, AND I, NICOLAE CARPATHIA, SHALL BECOME THE RULER OF PLANET EARTH!!!! THEN, I SHALL SPIT IN THE FACE OF GOD HIMSELF, AND SET MYSELF ON A THRONE OF GOLD!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

GOOD NIGHT, AMERICA!!!! (The Democrats look at each other, slightly puzzled, then cheer wildly).

SONG PARODY ALERT!!!! Kelsea Ballerini Sings About The Hole In The Border

 

Old Slow Joe, Another executive order

and now thousands of illegals are gathering at the border

He don't care, the super spreader clown

Ask Jen Psaki, She just says 'We'll just circle around'

There's a hole in the border, Biden's lost his mind

He'll just say that Trump was being unkind

The taxpayers will cry when they find

They're paying for the hole in the border, Don't whine

They'll vote for us, Nancy is hopin'

They'll tell us the border is barely open

We'll get cnn to raise a fuss

If you give them free stuff, then they will vote for us

There's a hole in the border, Biden's lost his mind

He'll just say that Donald Trump was being unkind

The taxpayers will cry when they find

They're paying for the hole in the border, Don't whine

Meet our new voters, Don't you whine 

You're paying for the hole in the border, don't whine (giggle)

Sargeant Hartman : Elect A Clown, Expect A Circus

ATTENTION!!!!!

WHICH OF YOU TWINKLE-TOED, PUSSY WEIRDO COMMUNISTS ELECTED THIS CORRUPT  CLOWN PRESIDENT????!!!! OH, IT'S THE FUCKING FAIRY GODMOTHER!!!!I notice nobody on facebook wants to tell us what a great president Slow-Joe Biden is!!!

So far, he's signed over 50 executive orders, and EACH ONE IS MORE DAMAGING TO OUR WONDERFUL COUNTRY THAN THE NEXT!!! HE'S KILLED TENS OF THOUSANDS OF JOBS! HIS CABINET PICKS ARE A DAMNED, STINKING ROTTEN JOKE!!!!

His 'Climate Czar' John Kerry is a zillionaire WITH A HUGE CARBON FOOTPRINT, and he wants to preach at everyday, normal Americans on CLIMATE CHANGE. BULLCRAP!!!!! He also looks like Lurch from 'The Addams Family. One thing for sure, You put John Kerry in your administration, and your country will always take a 'Lurch to the Left.'

Then, there's this new HHS official Dr. Rachel Levine, who was born a man, but he/she wears a big, funny-looking blond wig. and idetntifies as a woman. Honestly, this damned weirdo is SO UGLY, HE/SHE COULD BE A MODERN ART MASTERPIECE!!!! This monstrosity wants 10-year-old kids to decide their gender! 

WELL EXCUSE ME!!!! I thought GOD already did that!

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Former Fort Wayne Mayor Pete Buttplug is Bidens's pick for Secretary of Transportation. Apparently, he is qualified because he's a peter puffer (There aren't enough homos in the government) and he once said he likes riding the train, or something. HE SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!!!!

Slow-Joe's administration are also trying to punish Normal, law-abiding gun owners. All I got to say to them is 'Molon Labe, assholes!!!'

Well, that's all for now. As you were.

These Cancel Culture Leftists Are NUTS!!!!: A Dr. Frasier Crane Commentary

In these insane times, we at RSR are doing our best to make some sense of the world. When you watch the news, it appears that the inmates are running this asylum. Here to comment is world-famous psychiatrist, Dr. Frasier Crane:

Thank you, RedSquirrel,

I am Dr. Frasier Crane, and I am listening....to absolute nutcases who want to cancel The Muppets and Dr. Seuss! We're actually taking these people seriously instead of laughing at this silliness!

If you're offended by The Muppet Show, then you need to be wrapped in a straitjacket, and may I prescribe at least five solid years of extensive psychiatric help! 99.99999% of Americans have NO PROBLEM WITH KERMIT THE FROG! Why is the lone muppetphobe getting any attention?

This society should give the cancel culture intensive 'ridicule therapy' until they learn to keep their sick thoughts locked deep inside. Some of us love Aunt Jemima! Learn to live and let live!

As for these utter jackasses who are offended by something as benign as 'Cat In The Hat', I suggest several sessions of extreme shock therapy. We should keep these weirdos in a padded room! If you see racism in Dr. Seuss books, YOU'RE NUTS!!! You have failed the Rorschach test!!!!

A lot of the problems can be placed at the feet of American universities. The professors brainwash young people with various communistic and race idiologies, then these entitled young maniacs are set loose on society. They have no skills that will improve society, so some of them become.........EGADS!!!...POLITICIANS!!!

Then, there's the selfie culture. Many of these so-called 'protestors' you see on the nightly news are malignant narcissists. They burn down a neighborhood, and their friends take pictures. They see a man die on the news, and they protest his death BY KILLING OTHER PEOPLE AND BURNING THEIR BUSINESSES TO THE GROUND. THEN, THEY STRIKE A POSE. HEY, LOOK AT MEEEEE!!!!

In conclusion, we cannot allow this madness to rule the day. We should be building prisons and asylums for these nutjobs. 

I am Dr. Frasier Crane, and I am listening.