Washington Independence Day Parade Cancelled

This just in. Due to leftist outcry, the DC 4th of July celebration of America has been cancelled.

Leftists complained about President Trump's inclusion of American military tanks and fighter jets, claiming that's what they do in North Korea, not America.

Plus, the blatant patriotism would offend those who don't share President Trump's love of America. Several leftist and anti-American groups found a judge in the 9th Circuit of Appeals to rule that America patriotism is unconstitutional.

Oh, this just in. We've just heard that there WILL be a 4th of July parade, sponsored by Billionaire George Soros and hosted by MSNBC''s morning show hosts, Joe and Mika!

Hold on! The parade is starting!

Here comes the Grand Marshals of the parade.....the (39?) Democrat candidates for President! Bernie Sanders is waving an old Soviet flag, Mayor Pete is waving a wiener, and Elizabeth Warren is dressed like the Land-O-Lakes native American princess!

Now, here comes the 10 CAIR floats. The adherents of the religion of peace are getting off their floats and are now blocking the street, ass up in prayer. Don't worry, the parade should resume in about an hour.....

Look out! Here comes the Reparations For Slavery float, with The Reverend Al Sharpton yelling thru a bullhorn!

Now, here comes that crying Hillary voter, screaming into the sky. Don't worry lady, there's an election coming up in 2020.

Wow, here comes about 400 illegal aliens, with Mexican flags, and flags from South America and Africa.

As you know, American flags were determined to be hate speech.

Here comes The AntiFa float! Now, these warriors for freedom are jumping off the float and have started beating up the onlookers! Wow! That'll leave a mark!

Here comes a float, with the words America Sucks in large crepe lettering. Minnesota's 5th District Representative Ilhan Omar is shouting through a bullhorn. Now, the call of prayer is blasting thru ultra-powerful loudspeakers

Bringing up the rear in this parade is the Free College Tuition Float. Chances are, the kids on this float will always be bringing up the rear.

Well, that's our 4th of July parade. If America still exists a year from now, we'll do this again. See ya next year.