And Now, 'The ''We're All Gonna Die'' Weather Forecast

It's an absolutely Hellish 90 degrees out there . This record-breaking heat is unprecedented in human history, perhaps even WORLD HISTORY, and the government is warning all Americans to stay inside DURING THIS MAJOR HEAT ADVISORY.

If you have any elderly relatives or friends, check in on them to make sure that they HAVE NOT BEEN ROASTED IN THIS JULY OVEN!!!

Here at the station we are hearing reports of Bald Eagles SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTING. If YOU HAVE TO USE AIR CONDITIONING JUST REMEMBER THAT YOUR A/C UNIT MAY BE CONTRIBUTING TO GLOBAL CLIMATE CHANGE, AND YOU MAY BE KILLING PEOPLE IN FRANCE AND SPAIN.

Also, the use of dirty fossil fuels may cause fires and unhealthy smokey conditions AND WE MAY EXPERIENCE A WEATHER APOCALYPSE OR EXTINCTION LEVEL EVENT THIS WEEKEND!!!

DO NOT GO OUTSIDE FOR ANY REASON. DON'T PLAY BASEBALL OR VOLLYBALL. IF YOU WORK IN CONSTRUCTION, LEAVE WHERE YOU ARE AND THROW YOURSELF INTO THE NEAREST LAKE OR YOU WILL DIE!!!!!

WHEREVER YOU ARE, EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY!!!!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!!!!! THE SKY IS FALLING!!!!!

(Here's a clip of an American experiencing heatstroke, wearing his pants on his head and calling for a taxi in the middle of the desert):

And now for the 3-day forecast......

IF THE WORLD HASN'T ENDED WHERE YOU ARE, IT WILL BE EVEN WORSE TOMORROW ...UNLESS YOU CHOOSE TO ATTEND A COMMUNIST OR PRIDE PARADE WHERE WE'RE EXPECTING A NICE BREEZE!!!

FOR THE REST OF YOU, IT MIGHT REACH 92 OR 93 DEGREES with cancer-causing UV rays beating your head in TO A PULP!!! GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!

What Would Don Imus Be Saying Right Now?

With all of the lunacy happening in the news nowadays, I was wondering what radio legend Don Imus would be saying about it all right now. Here's a condensed version:: 

The Imus In The Morning Radio Show in progress......

(Quack Quack)

Imus: I'm liking that hottie Sophie Cunningham protecting her little buddy Caitlan Clarke from the nappy-headed hoes ROUGHING HER UP, and did you see her POINTING at the other player? I thought she was jost showing the illegal aliens and America-hating commies ''THE DOOR'' (Frank McCord laughs)......

(Everyone in the studio yells ''WE LOVE YOU, SOPHIE!!!!!'' in unison.)

Imus: So, we had an election in New York, and the STUPID voters elected that communist Islamo-NAZI BIGOT Zohran Mamdani. I'm a rich White Guy and HAD TO LEAVE THE CITY, so now we're in exhile here in SANTA FE, NEW MEXICO, and I'm hanging out with my brother Fred and  my wife Diedre Coleman Imus here at the ranch.

(Bernard McGirk); Has Mayor Mamdani opened up those government-ran grocery stores he was promising his retarded voters? They should be standing in line for toilet paper any day now.

Did you hear that bigot douche re-drew the immigrant map showing the enclaves and he erased the Jewish, Irish, and Italian  neighborhoods?

(BERNARD MCGIRK BRISTLES): THAT RACIST (QUACK)-HOLE!!!!! (Imus laughs).

Imus: I think there will be a street war between The Mohammadons and The Communists versus The Gambini's any day now, and I'm rooting for The Gambini's.....(QUACK QUACK)

In other news, I AM SO DISAPPOINTED that NAZI (QUACK) HOLE GRAHAM PLATNER dropped out of that SENATE race in Maine. Platner would have been SO GOOD FOR THIS SHOW!!!! HE COULD HAVE GIVEN US SO MUCH MATERIAL!!! (laughs)

He could still be in that race if he just announced his conversion to Islam. Mohammadons are EXPECTED to act like pigs around women. He could just say if he raped those women he was just OBEYING THEIR IMAGINARY MOON IDOL ALLAH!

Oh, did you see that braindead whackjob Sunny Hostin on ''The View''? SHE said that she saw all the American flags during The Independence Day weekend and she was afraid?

(Bernard McGirk): Why, is she a communist spy?

Imus: All the looney idiots call you an ''Islamophobe'' if you don't want your wife stoned to death, and your daughter raped and murdered. What do you even CALL SOMEONE WHO HAS AN UNNATURAL FEAR OF AN AMERICAN FLAG????? GET A GRIP, GIRL!!!!!

Have you seen Secretary of State Marco Rubio? He has like 7 or 8 jobs now. He's even babysitting for Trump Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt's new baby.

....And now, it's the top of the hour news, here's our very own Charles McCord. Good Morning, Chuck)

CHARLES MCCORD: GOOD MORNING, I-MAN. In overnight news, President Trump ordered another round of bombings on Iranian military infrastructure........(The producer pops a cassette of THE GAP BAND ''YOU DROPPED THE BOMB ON ME''  into the tape deck)

(CHARLES MCCORD READS THE MORNING NEWS)

Imus: Is the GAYTOLLAH ALIVE????

Bernard: Why, are you missing your bae?

Imus: Shut up, you bald-headed bastard.(laughing) Shut up or I'll beat you like a rented mule. (EVERYONE IN THE STUDIO LAUGHS)

Give Hate A Chance

In 1992, conservative writer P.J. O'Roarke (pictured) wrote a book ''Give War A Chance'', a satiracal look at war and peace. The title was an ironic twist on the title of the John Lennon song ''Give Peace A Chance''.

Your bushy-tailed pundit would like to twist this idea even deeper. I think that in order to conserve and save our great country as well as Western Civilization as a whole, we should GIVE HATE A CHANCE.

Many people equate ''hate'' with ''racism'', and that I am somehow calling for roving bands of lunatics with white bedsheets over our heads, burning crosses. I am calling for The American People to have the common sense and wisdom to call EVIL out when it happens. Jesus Christ hated the money-changers turning his place of worship into a place for Godless commerce. Also, The Allies wouldn't have EVER won World War 2 without us BEING ABLE TO HATE OUR ENEMIES.  They were despotic and evil, and we were able to beat their asses.

If you ever have a chance to watch WW2-era propaganda, it is quite SHOCKING to our modern sensibilites, as our leaders referred to the Japanese as ''TOJOs'' and ''Japs''.

Now, didn't Jesus also say he hated ''LIARS''? Ah, there it is, PROVERBS 12:22. I think this still applies, like when communists and Toxic Empaths call themselves ''Democrats''.

In the last decade, we've discovered the terrible theft and fraud involving The CORRUPT Minnesota D.F.L. and their ROTTEN Somali supporters. Whistleblowers who warned us of this INJUSTICE were called ''racists''. Their lives were wrecked by the insanely corrupt D.F.L. 

I am calling on ALL rank-and-file Minnesota Democrats to admit their party has turned into a crime orgamization and HIDEOUS HATE GROUP. ALL DEMS CURRENTLY IN POWER SHOULD BE VOTED OUT AND MANY OF THEM BELONG IN PRISON.

Third-World corruptocrats like Minnesota Representative Ilhan Omar call us ''racists'' for protesting this theft. I suggest we should HATE HER NON-STOP B.S. BECAUSE SHE AND THOSE LIKE HER CAME INTO OUR mostly white COUNTRY AND STOLE FROM US. THEY ARE THE RACISTS!

Have you noticed that RACE HUSTLERS DEMONIZE White Americans even for sins from the distant past, while leftist LUNATICS HAVE MADE STRAIGHT ,WHITE CONSERVATIVE MEN THE MOST DEMONIZED AND DESCRIMINATED SEGMENT OF OUR SOCIETY? I SAY WE REJECT THE LEFTIST'S PROPAGANDA AND THAT REAL DIVERSITY MEANS ''ALL OF US''.

Instead of allowing this corrupt LUNACY, we should be throwing these foreign criminal thugs into prison and DEPORTING THEIR CLANS BACK TO THE COUNTRY THEY CAME FROM.

Moslems come into Western countries, and expect us TO ADOPT THEIR EVIL, ROTTEN WORLDVIEW, COMPLETE WITH THE ABUSE OF WOMEN, CHILD RAPE, and all the other horrors of what they call ''SHARIA LAW.'' I think that no Moslem should be allowed within 3,000 miles of ANY White-majority, Western democracy. I BET YOU THINK THAT TOO, BUT YOU'VE BEEN intimidated AND BAMBOOZLED BY THE REAL HATERS.

When you resist their INBRED lunacy, they call you an ''Islamophobe''. They will call you one even if you submit to their hateful, weird worldview and practices, SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL FIGHT BACK, RIGHT? HATING the Mohammadons AND THEIR SHITTY WORLDVIEW could VERY WELL save Western civilization.

By the way, I don't hate and want to banish ALL MOSLEMS. I think that former Minnesota Vikings Wide Reciever Ahmad Rashad is probably a pretty good guy and so he can stay.

I also DON'T HATE ANYONE WILLING TO LEAVE ME AND OUR FREEDOMS ALONE.  I just want the DOMINEERING, BULLYING, MURDEROUS mohammadons and the America-hating communists thrown out of the country.

I think that every college with communist, America-hating professors should be investigated., and any college with a professor who took to Twitter/X and celebrated the murder of Charlie Kirk should lose their taxpayer funding. THEY SHOULD BE HATED AND REVILED AND THESE EVIL, HATEFUL FREAKS SHOULD BE PUBLICLY SHAMED AND RELENTLESSLY MOCKED. They are destroying the country, and rotting the souls of our young people.

ALL I'M SAYING IS ''GIVE HATE A CHANCE.'' We may be saving our civilization.

HEADLINE: RACIST, ANTI-SEMITIC COMMUNIST NY MAYOR MAMDANI RE-DRAWS IMMIGRANT MAP, ERASING JEWISH, IRISH AND ITALIAN NEIGHBORHOODS

 

This city belongs to foreigners, Takers, Mohammadons, and Communists now! Whites and Capitalists should leave. (I will still tax you even if you no longer reside in OUR CITY!)

And Now, A Message From The Pathological Democrat Liars Of America

Democrats are hateful, dishonest lunatics, and they ruin cities, states, and entire countries. They spend all their time robbing the taxpayers and lying their asses off. They lie about THEIR OWN RECORD, accusing their enemies of what they themselves are guilty off. 

Most Democrats would sell their families to the communists and militant mohammadons and accept shariah law if they thought it meant that they could somehow feed their insatiable lust for power.

They lie about America's history, they call our humanity into question, they politicize EVERY aspect of life, and almost no one can escape their ultra-aggressive, insane, constant LYING: Here to address this is The Spokesman of The Pathological Democrat Liars of America:

Hi, I am Tommy Flanangan. I'm related to Minnesota Lieutenant Governor and Senatorial candidate Peggy Flanagan. In fact, I'm her........Her TWIN BROTHER!! Yeah, That's the ticket!!!

Just remember, ''Nobody is illegal on stolen land''. America was BUILT by UNDOCUMENTED IMMIGRANTS....AND SOMALIS!! IT'S THE WHITE MAN WHO CAME ILLEGALLY, AND STOLE ALL THE LAND.....AND THEY'RE THE ONES WHO SHOULD BE DEPORTED!!! 

Thomas Jefferson STOLE THE LOUSIANA PURCHASE FROM THE NAVAJOS...Yeah, That's the ticket! A...AND TEDDY ROOSEVELT stole Alaska from the Eskimoes.  Peter Minuet STOLE MANHATTAN FROM THE NATIVE AMERICANS with blankets full of tubercalosis AND OUR LORD AND SAVIOR ZOHRAN MAMDANI RE-BUILT The New York skyline. Yeah, THAT'S THE TICKET!!!

''The Republicans want to ban books, while WE DEMOCRATS want to ban HUNGER!!!''

Just like my hero, Governor of Minnesota, Tim Walz. says. You rotten Republicans want to ban SO-CALLED age-inappropriate pornography from elementary schools. How will all the 10-year-old trans activists in the government elementary schools even know if they are a boy or a girl or if they like boys or girls without these books to learn from????? Without pornography, HOW WILL KIDS LEARN TO READ??? HOW?????

 It was Democrats who introduced The ''FEEDING OUR FUTURE'' program as a government Covid-rea program ''designed'' to feed hungry Americans.In Minnesota, KIDZZZ WERE STARVING JUST LIKE THEY WERE IN 1985 ETHIOPIA BECAUSE OF THOSE DASTARDLY REPUBLICANS!!!

 I AM HAPPY TO SAY THAT DOZENS OF SOMALIS WILL NOT GO HUNGRY BECAUSE OF THE FEEDING OUR FUTURE PROGRAM.!!!!  IN FACT, MANY SOMALIS ARE ABLE TO PURCHASE LUXURY HOMES AND AUTOMOBILES BECAUSE OF THIS PROGRAM!!! Yeah, That's the ticket!!!!

This week, New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani's wife said that Mother Mary, Jesus's mother was an ''UNDOCUMENTED  MIGRANT AND A PALESTINIAN! In fact, Jesus was a Hamas COMMANDER!!! Yeah, that's the ticket! A,,,,AND HE BE=HEADED BABIES AND RAPED 14 YEAR OLD JEWISH GIRLS DURING THE INVASION OF OCTOBER 7, 2023........B.C.!!!!!

YEAH......THAT'S THE TICKET!!!!!!

Finally, that NAZI KING Trump AND HIS ICE GESTAPO KIDNAP UNDOCUMENTED IMMIGRANTS AND MURDER THE PROTESTORS.....JUST BECAUSE THAT ANGEL RENEE GOOD TRIED TO RUN ONE OF THEM OVER!!!! THAT'S NO EXCUSE!!!!!!!!! SHE WAS MURDERED BECAUSE SHE RESISTED THE FASCISTS AND RACIST ADMINISTRATION!!!!!

YEAH.....THAT'S THE TICKET!!!!

If We Republicans Acted Like Democrats We Would Be (And Should Be) Ashamed Of Ourselves

This week, members of The (Masked) Patriot Front, a group of liberal idiots masquerading as White Nationalists, boarded a DC Metro train in their sunglasses, masks, and tan khakis, and ''surrounded'' a lone Black female rider.

There was a photographer from Reuters on the scene to capture the performative stupidity, and the hosts on CNN and MSNOW had trouble breathing as they expressed their ''terror'' at the image of this silly, fake stunt. They compared the Black female to Rosa Parks, and nobody at CNN informed their misinformed viewers that this was very LIKELY a performance from the threatrical wing of The Southern Poverty Law Center. 

The SPLC was RECENTLY caugtht fraudulently throwing millions of taxpayer dollars pulling racist stunts so they ''could fight racism.'' This scene on the train must have been the latest performance starring these ''right-wing thespians''. Instead of admitting what this really was, all the Trump-hating yapping liberal parrots said this picture is ''TRUMP'S AMERICA''.  Leftist activist Brian Krassenstein even tweeted ''This photo should win the Pulitzer.''

ULP, I just threw up a little.

Leftists are ALWAYS putting on custumes and acting like the ultra-obnoxious version of what they think their enemies are. Tim Walz and LEFTIST SNOB John Kerrey put-on their Elmer Fudd costume when they want to come across like ''regular guys''. Some creeps dress like drag queens, offending any NORMAL, REAL woman. These masked Patriot Front douches dress in sunglasses, masks, and tan khaki pants and march around like Ku Klux Klan rejects. TAKE OFF THE MASKS, YOU COWARDS!

For the left, EVERY DAY is Halloween.

Have you EVER seen current House Speaker Mike Johnson or ANY Republican put on a Democrat costume and act like lunatic morons? If ANY Republican EVER did this, he or she would be primaried out of office and universally shunnned. If we Republicans ever acted like Democrat-Socialists we would be (and should be) ashamed of ourselves.

There is A BIG DIFFERENCE between ICE AGENTS WEARING MASKS and THE MASKED PATRIOT FRONT. ICE AGENTS HAVE TO wear masks because dangerous LEFTIST protestors will DOXX and threaten their families if these federal agents are identified.

To appeal to ''EVERYDAY, NORMAL'' MALE VOTERS, the Dems recruited Graham Platner to run against Maine's ultra-moderate Senator Susan Collins. Platner has a NAZI tattoo on his chest, and has a long history of ACTING LIKE A PIG AROUND WOMEN. This is how The Democrats plan to appeal to ''NORMAL, EVERYDAY'' MALE VOTERS? 

Democrat strategists must think it's a bad idea to educate or inform the voters,  just put on ANOTHER BIG, SILLY SHOW. Will The Democrats EVER end this silliness? Don't hold your breath. 

SPORTS: BELGIUM BEATS USA 4-1 IN NO-HANDS, KICK HOCKEY (TRUMP BLAMED FOR LOSS)

 

Ralph Wiggum: The Supreme Court's Majority Decision On Birthright Citizenship Is Nice!

LAST WEEK was a bad week in the history of what's left of our country, as The Supreme Court DECIDED to liberalize Birthright Citizenshiup laws.  Ruling against a President Trump executive order, THE HIGH COURT RULED THAT anyone can enter the country to give birth, even ChiCom operatives and illegal immigrants.

NOW, You don't have to be the least bit loyal to America or know anything about being an American citizen.  You can just use this country for purposes of birth tourism, and ANYONE can plan a week's vacation to give birth while they're here. The baby is AUTOMATICALLY a legal American citizen. 

Here to give his opinion on this decision is our resident liberal legal expert, Springfield's resident legal scholar, Ralph Wiggum:

Oh no, I got a crayon stuck in my nose!

It was NICE for The Supreme Court to let babies of undocumented immigrants become Americans, as they decided to let the WHOLE WORLD STAY, especially if they want FREE STUFF. MY FAVORITE SUPREME COURT JUSTICE Kitangi Brown-Jackson, along with Rooter Sotorooter, Kegel, Roberts, the high school rapist Kavanaugh and the Pope's Mom Barrett ruled for the majority. Uncle Tom Clarence Thomas, Alito, and Gollum ruled for the meanies.

Oh darn, I just swallowed some paste. MY TONGUE IS STUCK!!!! MY TONGUE IS STUCK!!!!!

Now, your baby doesn't have to do all that PAPERWORK to be an American! 130,000,000 Americans can't read, so what's another 20,000,000? It's unpossible to pass a high school English test if you don't even know English, so why punish a baby before he or she can even LEARN to speak?

WE ARE AFRAID OF ICE. IT IS SLIPPERY, MEAN AND DANGEROUS STRANGER DANGER!!!! THE TRUMP MEANIES PUT UNDOCUMENTED BABIES IN CAGES!!!!! I SAW AOC CRYING ON THE VIEW!!! INOW I'M SCARED OF THAT SONG ICE ICE BABY!!!!

It is UNCONSCIONABLE that 3 of the justices tried to take birthrights away from babies. That's not very welcoming! Some people are complaining about birth tourism. Is it ANYBODY'S BUSINESS IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A BABY WHILE YOU'RE ON VACATION????

I think it was my hero Governor Tampon Tim who said ''One man's ILLEGAL ALIEN is another man's NEIGHBOR.''

That's it for now. Darn, I just stapled by head to my shoulder.

HEADLINE: HORROR WRITER / MAINE RESIDENT STEPHEN KING HOPES CANDIDATE PLATNER STAYS IN SENATE RACE

 

Graham Platner Saves His Candidacy By Announcing His Conversion To Islam

Embattled Maine Democrat Senatorial Candidate Graham Platner has announced his conversion to Islam, saving his candidacy. As a Muslim observing the female abuse-rape-forced child marriage tenants in Shariah law, recent credible sexual assault accusations have SUDDENLY become a CAMPAIGN BOOST.

PLATNER CAN NOW SAY HE'S JUST BEING OBEDIENT TO ALLAH, and finds his popularity almost DOUBLE among TRUMP-HATING FEMALE DEMOCRATS. 

Many anti-Semitic lunatic mohammadons like Hassan Piker are excited to throw their support behind Platner, but Piker is still watchful of his commitment to the cause of replacing a Constitutional Republic with an Islamic-Communist Dictatorship.

Soon, there could be SCORES OF Palestian flags and signs reading ''Susan Collins, We're Coming For You Next'' ''From The River To The Sea'', and 'Behead Collins'' at Graham Platner rallies.

Many Muslim voters already find Platner's SS TOTENKOPF chest tattoo quite attractiuve. His enemies are their enemies, therefore, Platner has friends among Jew-hating Muslims AND COLLEGE GRADUATES. They see no real controversy with the tattoo. 

Still, Platner still has work ahead. He needs to grow a beard, or some Muslim leaders may think that he looks too much like a woman. He also has to put his wife in a Hijab and beat her if she disobeys him. Many Democrats and Muslims agree with Platner that it's the woman's fault if she is raped, and if you accuse a Muslim of AMY crime it's only because you're a RACIST.

With Platner's conversion to Islam, Senator Bernie Sanders and several other DC Democrats of The Red-Green COALITION are thinking about renewing their support. Still, they may need to step up their voter fraud operation in Maine to win in November.

Yakov Smirnoff Reports From Comrade Mandani's Fifth Of July Parade

It's Independence Day weekend across America, and in much of the country, happy Americans celebrate our nation's 250th birthday, while in New York City, Communist Mayor Zohran Mamdani is ''reflecting'' on America's history of racism and ''injustice''..

He's not reflecting on Islam's 1,700 year history of rape, murder, and enslavement or 100+ years of communist carnage.

Our New York Correspondent Yakov Smirnoff is on the scene at Mamdani's ''Fifth of July'' Parade down 5th, 6th, AND 7th Avenue, beginning AND  ending at Time's Square. The Mayor has banned the general public, but there seems to be a parade starting:

Hello, RedSquirrel, This is Yakov reporting from Times Square. There are probaby 10,000 Muslims praying to Allah here. Mamdani banned the general public. In other word's ''Americans, Jews, and Christians.'' He said there isn't enough room for both Americans and thousands of Muslims with their asses in the air praying. These Muslims have a float with the words ''DEATH TO AMERICA'' festooned with crepe paper. The Mayor is seated on it waving to an imaginary crowd.

Here comes another vehicle decorated with a big sign which reads ''Mamdani Power And Light''. I have learnied that Comrade Mamdani will be taking control of ALL THE UTILITES IN THE CITY AND has told residents that they should turn their thermostat up to 78 degress to deal with this hot weather. He wants his illegal alien voters living rent- free in luxury hotel suites, and they are to be allowed to turn THEIR THERMOSTATS down to 62.

WHAT A COMMIE!!!! heh, heh, heh......WOW, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN THIS WINTER!!!!

Mamdani's Motto: ''Rules for thee, not for me. You work, I eat. If you don't like it, tough toenails.''

There's a LONG LINE of Mamdani supporters carrying a banner reading ''DEMOCRATIC SOCIALISTS OF AMERICA''.Why do I get the feeling I will soon be seeing these same people standing in line at the city government-ran grocery stores waiting in line for toilet paper? Heh, heh, heh.

In America, toilet paper waits for you. In Comrade Mamdani's NYC, you wait in line for toilet paper.

In this Communist parade, I see no tanks, but there are OVERSIZED POSTERS OF COMMUNIST LEADERS MAMDANI AND THE THREE COMMUNIST CANDIDATES WHO RECENTLY WON IN THEIR PRIMARIES AGAINST ESTABLISHMENT DEMOCRATS.

Here's a float with NYC's Renter's Rights Activists. It's decorated with puppet landlords hanging in effegy. YIKES!!!

Here's a float with America's founding Fathers depicted as demons. Someone FROM LA RAZA dressed as an Indian chief is making A LAND ACKNOWEDGMENT through a bullhorn, AND there's a group of children from a local government elementary school, lead by their purple-haired ''teachers'' chanting ''NO ONE IS ILLEGAL ON STOLEN LAND!!!''

They've replaced ''reading and writing'' with ''revolution and rioting.''

Here's The Columbia University float, who are representing The America-hating hate indoctrination industry (cough: colleges), and here's a float left over from a recent ''No King's'' protest with President Trump hanging in effegy, I'm also SEEING THE ''DEATH TO AMERICA'' float, and THE BLM FLOAT, along with  the ''Love And Tolerance'' float. WOW! IT'S A SEA OF HYPOCRACY!!!! Heh, heh, heh.......

There will be no fireworks here, only violent criminals and activists from BURN LOOT MURDER celebrating their freedom by shooting their shotguns into the air,

We're not sure if or when it will be safe for EVERYDAY Americans to step foot in Time's Square again. This is your correspondent Yakov Smirnoff, signing off from Comrade Mamdani's July FIFTH Parade in New York. So long! Heh, heh. heh...

WNBA STAR SOPHIE CUNNINGHAM SHOWS ILLEGAL ALIENS AND AMERICA-HATERS ''THE DOOR'

 

Our New Top Ten List: The Top Ten Ways To Celebrate Our 250th Independence Day

Saturday marks the 250th anniversary of the signing of our Declaration of Independence, and most Americans will find some way of celebrating our womderful country's Birthday. Some will have a backyard barbeque or see a fireworks display. While some seem angry that this country still exists, this is OUR ''No Kings Day''. 

From the home office in Bovey. Minnesota, here are The Top Ten ways REAL Americans might be celebrating our country's 250th Independence Day:

10. Deport Ilhan Omar.

 9.  Kiss your dog and eat a BLT in front of your perpetually offended muslim neighbor.

 8.  Ask a Socialist-Democrat to hold dangerous fireworks before lighting it.

 7.  Have a trans activist committed.

 6.  two words: TAXPAYER REVOLT!!!

 5.  DEPORT THE MUSLIMS!!!! (Former Minnesota Viking Wide Reciever Ahmad Rashad can stay.)

 4.  Steal some MORE LAND!! LET'S TAKE CUBA NEXT!!!

 3. Declare war on England AND BEAT THEIR ASSES AGAIN!!!!

 2. THROW ZOHRAN THE MORON MAMDANI (AND ALL OF HIS VOTERS) OUT OF THE COUNTRY.

 1. Tar and feather a tax collector..

Marlon Perkins And The North American Democrat-Socialist Cuckoo Bird

I was listening to a talk radio program last week when a guest compared the new extremist communist-backed Democrat politicians (THE DSA-Democrat Socialists of America) with The Cuckoo bird. 

This species will invade another bird's nest, kill the Mother's babies, and lay it's own eggs. 

The invasive, preditory, parasitic nature of these communist-Socialists who have invaded The Democrat Party establishment act in MUCH the same way. Here to explain this is our new wildlife correspondent Marlon Perkins, host of Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom:

Thank you, RedSquirrel. Today on Mutual of Omaha's Wild KIngdom, we study the strange and terrible habits of The Socialist Democrat Cuckoos of North America.

This preditory, parasitic species have been laying it's eggs in the nests of the ESTABLISHMENT DEMOCRAT NESTS. Three extremist-communists have defeated Democrat establishment birds in recent New York Democrat primaries.

They replicate the call of the red-green Mamdani bird, tickling the ears of angry college grad bolchevik parasites, who respond by voting for the takeover of THE NEST.

Most of these communist voters come from various countries hostile to America. Many are second-generation immigrants, INDOCTRINATED TO attack America on American universities. These Communsit Democrat Cuckoos attack and seek the destruction of the nest, and hunt for The Great American Orange Trumpucanis Maga.

Many of these communist Democrat cuckoos have been laying their eggs on American college universities for generations. There, the young cuckoos are taught and groomed to attack even more nests. They attack Jews, capitalists, and engage in class-warfare against more productive species..

Here is my assistant Jim. He has gotten too close to a nest of mahammadon cuckoos, and now he's being attacked. The cuckoos think he might be a Jew or a capitalist because he has a light complection. GET OUT OF THERE, JIM!!!!

The other birds in this ecosystem are ''makers'' and the communist Democrat cuckoos are ''takers''. Now, the nest taken over by the cuckoos has shrunk, and is falling apart. The cuckoos look for more nests to use BECAUSE THEY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO BUILD A NEST THEMSELVES.. The Mamdani bird has promised free worms for everyone, but his flock of cuckoos will have to fend for themselves soon.

The Mamdani bird has tried to raise the taxes on the top 10% of the most productive species, but they have flown away to Florida and Texas. Soon, The Socialist-Democrat Cuckoo may go the way of The Dodo.

Well, that's it for this week's Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. I am Marlon Perkins. See you  next week.

It's Called Summer: An Andy Rooney Commentary

Andy Rooney is here to remind us that Summer is SUPPOSED TO BE HOT:

HEY LOOK, IT'S SUMMER. Some people seem to be SURPRISED by this, like the newscasters telling us to hydrate yourself and stay inside if it's too hot for you. It gets hot this time of year, EVERY YEAR. It's JULY!!!

Here in America, we LOVE OUR FREEDOM AS WELL AS OUR AIR CONDITIONING. On The Fourth of JULY we celebrate our Independence Day. We have barbeques in the hot July sun, then enjoy some simulated warfare FIREWORKS at night. Most of us are too busy enjoying our blessings to bitch about ''Global Climate Change'' or ''emissions''.

Some people hate us because of our A/C, like those silly socialist surrender monkeys in France. They blame air conditioners for everybody dying from heat-stroke over in Europe. YES, These silly scammers blame us for THEIR WEATHER. MON DIEU!!!

Paris Deputy Mayor Audrey Pulvar blames America for the miserables de LaHeate, as the governments in Europe are deliberatly keeping their people hot and miserable in order to make their population grumble even more about it, and they can then demonize the countries that offer THE BLESSING of air conditioning. 

She blames America for France's weather problem, but looking at this picture of her, I have to wonder ''who should she blame for that ridiculous hair helmet''?

I don't care what the French say. I think that AIR CONDITIONING is one of THE GREATEST INVENTIONS EVER CREATED BY MAN! VIVE LE A/C!!!